One of the biggest reasons that the prosperity gospel is flawed would be ‘the come up.’ Most people do not do well with a drastic and/sudden change in resources and lifestyle. There is something to be said for working and earning what one has over time. There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting a more comfortable lifestyle. But the truth is that too many become ugly inside from how having money changes the individual.
If too much is given or obtained too quickly, there is a lack of appreciation for what one has and nothing is sufficient or enough. But there is also the lack of empathy for those around the one who feels that they are now removed from their previous situation. It manifest in many ways but in most cases it makes one a great consumer and not a producer. The money is not the problem, the true refection of the heart is the problem. I would even go so far as to say that money can have a negative affect on a person's prayer life. This is why Christians often times dont do well with wealth, the wealth comes at the cost of having a heart, toward God and others.
Consumers are those who love to use their spending power on things that they didn’t have before. How one spends their resources is the easiest way to tell old money from new money. New money makes poor spending decisions on items that are mostly for bragging rights and with very little or no asset value, and most often to impress people who are not impressed anyway. It is the fear of depravity wearing a mask of abundance. It is a facade.
The sudden ability to have what one never had before becomes overwhelming and even can lead to poor decision-making and gluttony. Being a consumer becomes addictive..... it becomes the high of being able to obtain what one never had, therefore leading to overspending, and poor decision making in purchasing more than what is needed. This is exactly why most professional athletes and lottery ticket winners, and drug dealers end up in the exact financial state with a few years. There is little to no knowledge about saving, investing, sound purchasing, or philanthropy.
When fear controls the individual it will cause a level of selfishness that leaves no room for investing in vetted causes or charities, and definitely not becoming a resource by founding a charitable or philanthropic organization. When Christians forget to help others, they risk missing out in the greatest way to be like Christ, and that is to become a giver and a producer. When Jesus fed the people, he did with no expectation of return or compensation. As a matter of fact, most of the time, Jesus told those that he did something for not to tell others. This is because the nature of God is to give. We learn to be like Christ in the way that we treat others. How we treat others is a direct reflection of how we see our relationship with God. When we have a positive outlook on our relationship with God, there is an openness to share not only the Good News of the Gospel, but to overall have a positive impact in the lives of others. We can truly be living examples of Christ on earth.
It has been proven that giving and affinity go hand-in-hand. A person will invest in what they have some emotional attachment to. Therefore, it can be said that those who suddenly obtain too much too fast become detached and lose their ability to care or to love others. Their affinity goes toward the obtained material wealth or objects obtained. This is why loving people, those you can see, is essential because it is a reflection on one’s relationship to God. And it can only be faked or pretended for a short span of time. The state of one’s heart will eventually be shown for how it truly is.
At the core, the basic need is a sense of resolve that comes only from right relationship with God. Therefore it can be said that the individual is seeking a form of peace that will never come from the material that is bought/purchased, but can only come from an internal peace. Like any other addiction the issue is not the outward manifestation, but is in fact the internal turmoil that is causing the outward affect. A lack of peace and the inability to see what God has gifted the person with besides material objects and economic ability will always leave the person to rely on what they can grasp and that is material and superficial. This all leads to a person who is shallow and superficial.
Money or material gain is not a guarantee of happiness. The most current events of the past few years where more and more famous/rich individuals are committing suicide is proof that one's internal state of being is much more important than tangible material gain or wealth. There are some things that every human being needs that money can not buy.
God wants us to have abundant life, including nice things, but as good stewards of that abundance, not wasteful and overindulged. Because we live in a culture that loves amenities and creature comforts, it’s hard to imagine living a life with less than the newest most fashionable and most desired objects. This is what capitalism is built on, the reliance on human beings to fulfill their depravity with objects instead of seeking internal peace. People in sales love hurting people because they purchase, they become repeat spenders. As a matter of fact, if more people had the Peace of God, the spending patterns of our entire world would change.
This is exactly what religious vows of poverty are about, not becoming consumed with being a consumer but actually becoming comfortable enough in the sufficiency of having basic needs met that one becomes productive both spiritually and naturally. Christians should be producers, should be people who seek out ways to help others find peace through sharing the gospel, the good news, but should also live a lifestyle that reflects the internal peace and the strength to not always needing to follow the trends of obtaining the newest object.
Let’s be honest money changes a person. There are very few people that are not affected by gaining wealth. or even a higher salary. But the important thing is to remember that the higher salary or the wealth is not the issue, it is a matter of what this does to the internal workings of the individual. One of the most grounding things that a person can do to remember who they really are is to remain a giver. Giving to others allows one to remain empathetic, if the individual allows their thought process to remain open and clear about the difference between self and the other person. Spending time around one's old neighborhood and staying connected to everyday life of everyday people can keep one open to receive the realization of how powerful God's sufficiency really is in keeping one resilient (Philippians 4:13). This is how you learn to be content and remain grateful. One of the things that I heard quite often growing up was the saying “but for the grace of God, there go I.”
Showing posts with label happiness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label happiness. Show all posts
June 11, 2018
May 13, 2018
URIAH
In the story of David and Bathsheba, we have a very interesting person who seems to get the short end of the situation. But I often wonder if this is the only way to look at this portion of text. I say that because Uriah the Hittite represents one of my greatest fears.
Before I explain my views on this portion of text, let me give just a bit of background information about myself. My father had 5 brothers. I lived in the house with my dad and my oldest male cousin who was 12 years older than myself. So you can say almost all of my childhood was one of feeling very protected, affirmed, and loved. I was my dad's only child so I was destined to be treated a certain way, better known as spoiled. With this many men in my childhood I was destined to not only get most anything that I wanted, because if one uncle said no, another uncle would either say yes, or find some way to compensate by offering something else that I might want. For example, if one uncle would not give me ice cream from the gas station up the street, all I had to do was to come back and make an announcement that I didnt get any ice cream. This would be followed by the men having conversation about why I was denied ice cream or what ever it was that I wanted. And not much time would pass before another uncle would invite me to go for a ride with him, only to end up at Kay's Ice Cream shop which had a whole bunch of flavors on display for me to choose from. This understanding of how men treat those they care for and love has framed my understanding of relationships in general. It has also set the bar for how I measure the behavior of men as an adult.
Growing up in a small town, during a time when people actually sat around and communicated with each other gave me a lot of insight from the perspectives of my aunts while they were stringing and breaking green beans or something. And many times, I got to hear the conversations (while I was supposed to be playing in the yard and not listening) of my dad and his brothers talking about community issues, political events, but also to hear a lot of conversation about women and relationships. By the time I got to be a teenager, my dad started to really talk to me about relationships directly. And those conversations helped me to understand how and why he treated some of the women that he dated differently from others.
Now back to Uriah, in 2 Samuel 11, we are told the events that lead to his death in the hottest battle. But before he died, he was given a chance to go home to his wife. Now upon reading the story, this was not as any favor to Uriah, but it was truly a set up to cover up what was going on with David and Bathsheba. So this is where I am going to talk briefly about Bathsheba's perspective, and how it reflects one of my greatest fears.
We really dont know anything about Bathsheba and Uriah's relationship. We have no idea what Bathsheba shared with King David about her relationship or home situation. We are not given any insight into the pillow talk that Bathsheba had with Uriah or with King David. So what we have to go on are just the facts that are presented in the text. I have heard it preached from a lot of different angles, and most of the time those angles portray Bathsheba as having negative behavior and motives, which I am not completely sure are presented in the wording or the tone of the text. But I am not going to debate that at this time. I want to really get to a woman's perspective of Uriah's decision not to go home to his wife.
Human behavior is very telling. Regardless of what a person says, their behavior tells the much larger portion of the truth. This frame of logic is how we are going to view Uriah's decision to sleep outside and not go home to his wife. I am going to simply say that he didnt want her, he didnt want to go home to her. He was a soldier who knew that he could die in battle any day, and he is given a chance to go home for a few nights to his wife and he would rather not, and says that it is his loyalty to the other soldiers who are not able to have this same opportunity to visit home.
A man in love, doesnt usually, really doesnt operate like that because love makes a man want to take every opportunity to spend time with the woman that he loves, even if it means returning to battle and his death the next day..... That is even more justification for him to take the opportunity to spend the night with the woman he loves. A man in love is caring and attentive, and willing to do his best to make sure the woman that he loves is happy. It was not as if Uriah was sneaking away to visit home, but he told to go home. Now we dont know if he suspected something, or even if he had heard gossip, because that is not given to us in the text, all we have is the excuse that he uses to not go into his home to his wife.
So can you imagine what that must have felt like for Bathsheba? Her husband is in town, but is sleeping outside with servants and refusing to come home to her. This is rejection, neglect, and disregard. Those are the things that a woman will get from a man who does not love her. So imagine Bathsheba being married to a man who has so little affinity or interest in being a husband to her. You might ask, so does this validate the theories that she was intentionally trying to be seen bathing? I dont know. But what we do see is a married man who declares more loyalty to the army and to the king, than to his wife, or even a desire for her.
To be in a relationship marriage with someone who does not love you and who does not want you is a miserable way to live out your days. Having to pretend to family and friends that everything is ok when there is no real love or passion is hurtful and draining. God's plan for marriage is for it to be the most loving and nourishing experience that affirms both the man and woman, in such a way that their bond is both spiritually and naturally strong. So when we see Bathsheba move on with her life after Uriah's death, I cant help but to think that she must have mourned his death, but that she must have also been relieved to not have to any longer pretend that she was loved and cared for my a man who really didnt want to come home to her. With Uriah out of the way, Bathsheba was free to be loved and cherished.
Before I explain my views on this portion of text, let me give just a bit of background information about myself. My father had 5 brothers. I lived in the house with my dad and my oldest male cousin who was 12 years older than myself. So you can say almost all of my childhood was one of feeling very protected, affirmed, and loved. I was my dad's only child so I was destined to be treated a certain way, better known as spoiled. With this many men in my childhood I was destined to not only get most anything that I wanted, because if one uncle said no, another uncle would either say yes, or find some way to compensate by offering something else that I might want. For example, if one uncle would not give me ice cream from the gas station up the street, all I had to do was to come back and make an announcement that I didnt get any ice cream. This would be followed by the men having conversation about why I was denied ice cream or what ever it was that I wanted. And not much time would pass before another uncle would invite me to go for a ride with him, only to end up at Kay's Ice Cream shop which had a whole bunch of flavors on display for me to choose from. This understanding of how men treat those they care for and love has framed my understanding of relationships in general. It has also set the bar for how I measure the behavior of men as an adult.
Growing up in a small town, during a time when people actually sat around and communicated with each other gave me a lot of insight from the perspectives of my aunts while they were stringing and breaking green beans or something. And many times, I got to hear the conversations (while I was supposed to be playing in the yard and not listening) of my dad and his brothers talking about community issues, political events, but also to hear a lot of conversation about women and relationships. By the time I got to be a teenager, my dad started to really talk to me about relationships directly. And those conversations helped me to understand how and why he treated some of the women that he dated differently from others.
Now back to Uriah, in 2 Samuel 11, we are told the events that lead to his death in the hottest battle. But before he died, he was given a chance to go home to his wife. Now upon reading the story, this was not as any favor to Uriah, but it was truly a set up to cover up what was going on with David and Bathsheba. So this is where I am going to talk briefly about Bathsheba's perspective, and how it reflects one of my greatest fears.
We really dont know anything about Bathsheba and Uriah's relationship. We have no idea what Bathsheba shared with King David about her relationship or home situation. We are not given any insight into the pillow talk that Bathsheba had with Uriah or with King David. So what we have to go on are just the facts that are presented in the text. I have heard it preached from a lot of different angles, and most of the time those angles portray Bathsheba as having negative behavior and motives, which I am not completely sure are presented in the wording or the tone of the text. But I am not going to debate that at this time. I want to really get to a woman's perspective of Uriah's decision not to go home to his wife.
Human behavior is very telling. Regardless of what a person says, their behavior tells the much larger portion of the truth. This frame of logic is how we are going to view Uriah's decision to sleep outside and not go home to his wife. I am going to simply say that he didnt want her, he didnt want to go home to her. He was a soldier who knew that he could die in battle any day, and he is given a chance to go home for a few nights to his wife and he would rather not, and says that it is his loyalty to the other soldiers who are not able to have this same opportunity to visit home.
A man in love, doesnt usually, really doesnt operate like that because love makes a man want to take every opportunity to spend time with the woman that he loves, even if it means returning to battle and his death the next day..... That is even more justification for him to take the opportunity to spend the night with the woman he loves. A man in love is caring and attentive, and willing to do his best to make sure the woman that he loves is happy. It was not as if Uriah was sneaking away to visit home, but he told to go home. Now we dont know if he suspected something, or even if he had heard gossip, because that is not given to us in the text, all we have is the excuse that he uses to not go into his home to his wife.
So can you imagine what that must have felt like for Bathsheba? Her husband is in town, but is sleeping outside with servants and refusing to come home to her. This is rejection, neglect, and disregard. Those are the things that a woman will get from a man who does not love her. So imagine Bathsheba being married to a man who has so little affinity or interest in being a husband to her. You might ask, so does this validate the theories that she was intentionally trying to be seen bathing? I dont know. But what we do see is a married man who declares more loyalty to the army and to the king, than to his wife, or even a desire for her.
To be in a relationship marriage with someone who does not love you and who does not want you is a miserable way to live out your days. Having to pretend to family and friends that everything is ok when there is no real love or passion is hurtful and draining. God's plan for marriage is for it to be the most loving and nourishing experience that affirms both the man and woman, in such a way that their bond is both spiritually and naturally strong. So when we see Bathsheba move on with her life after Uriah's death, I cant help but to think that she must have mourned his death, but that she must have also been relieved to not have to any longer pretend that she was loved and cared for my a man who really didnt want to come home to her. With Uriah out of the way, Bathsheba was free to be loved and cherished.
May 1, 2018
Distortion
Sin causes distortion, both in perspective and logic. This has been the case since the very beginning. From the 'you shall not surely die' to the present, the ways of distortion are the same, but the manifestations are every morphing.
In the Garden of Eden, when Adam and Eve did not drop dead at that exact moment, it began the distortion of timing and urgency. If one of them or both of them had died at that moment, it would have been the most clear message to them to obey, but it would have also been the end of their history. This is why these events were followed with some specific details as to what would happen for them in the rest of their lives as part of the consequences of their disobedience. But even those consequences did not change the outcome that was spoken to them, they would die.... not suddenly at that moment, but slowly aging and deteriorating.
There has always been and will always be a price to be paid for sin. The pride of life makes each of us think that time is on our side, that we have plenty of time to worry later about living according to God's principles. But this distorted view also means that if we are not willing to live according to the plan of God for our lives, we forfeit the over arching truth of God's plan for our lives. Not just in the context of life or death, but everything in life before one dies. This can mean years and decades of living beneath what was God's plan to bless your life. The distortion of sin is to believe that you can get for yourself better than what God wants to give you.
This makes some feel like the gamble is worth the risk to get what you can now and worry about the rest later. In this way, sin has accomplished its purpose to distract and distort not only our perception of God, but of self. Sin causes one to justify living in disregard to God's Biblical Principles. The distortion is manifested in the lack of urgency to do what it right, to work and strive toward doing what it right. Righteousness at its core is built around an internal desire to be as close to right as one possibly can in word and deed and intentions of heart. The state of the heart is reflected in one's actions.
Therefore, the distortion of sin is actually a distortion of the state of one's own heart. To see one's ways without wanting to weigh it against God's truth is the internal struggle to justify what is in one's own heart. The only way that the distortion can be removed so that one can truly see the truth of one's own heart is through God via the Holy Spirit to remove the distortion and giving the individual the opportunity to truly see one's self through the truth of God. What we see when we see our self through the truth of God can be hard to face, but necessary. We have to ask God to show us the ourselves as God sees us. What will we really see when we become courageous enough to see what God sees?
We all try to convince ourselves that our actions are justified and that our behavior is not that bad. But what is God really seeing? What is really in our heart? It takes the truth being clearly shown to the individual before the individual will realize there is a need for change toward doing what it right according to Biblical Principles. This is why the act of surrender is so important in the context of salvation. The ability to surrender to God and accept that Jesus Christ died for your sins, can have the most liberating effect.
Humbling is the reality that there are some things that one can not do for self. To realize that you can not change the condition of your own soul is humbling. It not only frees one from the bondage related to sinful habits and lifestyle choices, but it also frees one to be completely honest with God about areas of one's life that need to change for the better. It is in this, that the heaviness of one's heart is no long a weight to carry, but is left at the foot of the Cross.
Surrendering to God means letting go of the facade that everything is alright and the spiritual heaviness of all of the distortion caused by sin. To need God, to seek after God means that you don't have to live outwardly appearing to be OK, but internally knowing you are a mess. God is the mender of broken hearts.
In the Garden of Eden, when Adam and Eve did not drop dead at that exact moment, it began the distortion of timing and urgency. If one of them or both of them had died at that moment, it would have been the most clear message to them to obey, but it would have also been the end of their history. This is why these events were followed with some specific details as to what would happen for them in the rest of their lives as part of the consequences of their disobedience. But even those consequences did not change the outcome that was spoken to them, they would die.... not suddenly at that moment, but slowly aging and deteriorating.
There has always been and will always be a price to be paid for sin. The pride of life makes each of us think that time is on our side, that we have plenty of time to worry later about living according to God's principles. But this distorted view also means that if we are not willing to live according to the plan of God for our lives, we forfeit the over arching truth of God's plan for our lives. Not just in the context of life or death, but everything in life before one dies. This can mean years and decades of living beneath what was God's plan to bless your life. The distortion of sin is to believe that you can get for yourself better than what God wants to give you.
This makes some feel like the gamble is worth the risk to get what you can now and worry about the rest later. In this way, sin has accomplished its purpose to distract and distort not only our perception of God, but of self. Sin causes one to justify living in disregard to God's Biblical Principles. The distortion is manifested in the lack of urgency to do what it right, to work and strive toward doing what it right. Righteousness at its core is built around an internal desire to be as close to right as one possibly can in word and deed and intentions of heart. The state of the heart is reflected in one's actions.
Therefore, the distortion of sin is actually a distortion of the state of one's own heart. To see one's ways without wanting to weigh it against God's truth is the internal struggle to justify what is in one's own heart. The only way that the distortion can be removed so that one can truly see the truth of one's own heart is through God via the Holy Spirit to remove the distortion and giving the individual the opportunity to truly see one's self through the truth of God. What we see when we see our self through the truth of God can be hard to face, but necessary. We have to ask God to show us the ourselves as God sees us. What will we really see when we become courageous enough to see what God sees?
We all try to convince ourselves that our actions are justified and that our behavior is not that bad. But what is God really seeing? What is really in our heart? It takes the truth being clearly shown to the individual before the individual will realize there is a need for change toward doing what it right according to Biblical Principles. This is why the act of surrender is so important in the context of salvation. The ability to surrender to God and accept that Jesus Christ died for your sins, can have the most liberating effect.
Humbling is the reality that there are some things that one can not do for self. To realize that you can not change the condition of your own soul is humbling. It not only frees one from the bondage related to sinful habits and lifestyle choices, but it also frees one to be completely honest with God about areas of one's life that need to change for the better. It is in this, that the heaviness of one's heart is no long a weight to carry, but is left at the foot of the Cross.
Surrendering to God means letting go of the facade that everything is alright and the spiritual heaviness of all of the distortion caused by sin. To need God, to seek after God means that you don't have to live outwardly appearing to be OK, but internally knowing you are a mess. God is the mender of broken hearts.
February 14, 2018
LOVE IS MIGHTY
The holiday that is celebrated as Valentine's Day is completely made up by the materialistic and capitalistic agenda. There was a historical martyr who was killed for secretly marrying Christian couples during a time when it was forbidden. And this is significant for several reasons, because I can see our culture drifting towards attempting to make it illegal once again for Christians to marry, but that truth is not what is discussed on the holiday celebrated by this name. The world likes the money making aspect of the holidays, but wants to remove the Christian significance. And this holiday is no different. Mostly started by greeting card companies and embraced by jewelry distributors because it stands to bring great profits to their companies by simply selling a desired concept - Love.
The truth of the matter is that love is much greater and stronger than any card, flowers, candy or jewelry can represent. Yes, we all like to receive gifts. Yes, we appreciate that someone thinks enough to invest in showing how much they care. There is no question about that at all.
Love is spiritual. Love is a spiritual act. Love is about positive impact in the life of another person.
Love is essentially at the core of the human ability to understand how much God considers humanity (John 3:16). God's love can be gentle and kind, but God's love can also be redirecting and correcting. This is not the way that the marketing world wants you to see God's love. The little fat angels with arrows are completely different from the might angels that move at God's command. In this same way, the world shrinks love down to a materialistic expression. When in truth everything about God's love is mighty.
In this way, when God becomes the binding force in a relationship it becomes unbreakable. (Eccl 4:9-12). To love and to be loved is a beautiful thing that allows one to flourish in every aspect of life. The companionship is different from any other type of interaction. Love that is grounded in God's Love is nourishing. The love that the world markets at its core is like a leech, always looking for opportunity to deplete and take more and more without regard for return. But when God is at the core of love, there is a freedom to give and be what the other person needs without any consideration for the return, because the entire experience is enveloped in mutuality.
Mutuality is not the same as equality. Men can handle physical things that a woman was not designed to handle, and women can handle physical things that a man was not designed to handle. Here again, the secular world attempts to rebrand what God created. Men and women are designed by God with specific intention, and there are some distinct differences both in physical characteristics and skill sets. For example: A man's body is not designed or equipped to bring a living breathing life into this world, but a woman's body is built receive the seed, to carry the developing life, deliver the person into this world, and to feed the new person until the person is able to eat from other food sources. God designs with intention.
Each gender brings something complementary to the characteristics of the other. This is by God's design. Men and women were never created to contradict each other nor to be in competition with each other, but were created to contrast each other in a way that draws emphasis that displays the other. Men and women were designed to compliment each other.
The secular world screams for equality, but God's economy of love was created for us to bring to the other person what they dont have within their own self. This is what physical attraction is about and is at the core necessity of intimacy. Society attempts to devalue what is the most priceless part of how God created male and female, with distinction. Yes, there are plenty of things that a man can do just as well as a women, and there are plenty of things that a woman can do just as well as a man. But, when it is all said and done, we were not created for sameness, so even in having some of the same skill sets and many features in common, we are different and where created for the purpose of being what the other needs, but does not contain within self.
We must be careful not to allow similar skill sets to appear to be signs of compatibility. Team members often have the same strengths and the same passion, but each also has to bring something that the other does not have or possess. This is what makes the team a well functioning unit and a couple is a well functioning unit, a team.
This is why it is important to be equally yoked, for the productivity of the team (2 Corinthians 6:14). Both spiritually and naturally, this is important. When your life is connected to the life of another person, you have to agree on which direction and for what you are working towards. Common sense would tell you that you cant have one person wanting to go North and the other person wanting to go South, because then all of their energy is depleted in the internal struggle of the team not going the same direction. When there is a tug of war in a relationship, sadly, someone wins. And this means that someone is losing ground on the direction they want to go towards. This changes what should be a win-win into a win-lose. This is why it is so important to attach your life to someone who is spiritually going the same direction as yourself. When both individuals are determined to go in the same direction, then there is an agreement of effort that become empowering, because both are using their strengths and skills to move forward. The team wins together.
Traditional marriage is attacked because it is evident how strong a well working unit is in accomplishing anything that the team sets its mind to accomplish. God created marriage that way, and God designed it so that LOVE is central to motivate the individuals to withstand the most challenging of times and situations to stay focused on the end result of the family.
Growing together in God is empowering. With the love of Jesus Christ and the power of the Holy Ghost, the Christian couple is unified and formidable .
Godly love has a ripple affect of blessings in the life of the Christian.
The truth of the matter is that love is much greater and stronger than any card, flowers, candy or jewelry can represent. Yes, we all like to receive gifts. Yes, we appreciate that someone thinks enough to invest in showing how much they care. There is no question about that at all.
Love is spiritual. Love is a spiritual act. Love is about positive impact in the life of another person.
Love is essentially at the core of the human ability to understand how much God considers humanity (John 3:16). God's love can be gentle and kind, but God's love can also be redirecting and correcting. This is not the way that the marketing world wants you to see God's love. The little fat angels with arrows are completely different from the might angels that move at God's command. In this same way, the world shrinks love down to a materialistic expression. When in truth everything about God's love is mighty.
In this way, when God becomes the binding force in a relationship it becomes unbreakable. (Eccl 4:9-12). To love and to be loved is a beautiful thing that allows one to flourish in every aspect of life. The companionship is different from any other type of interaction. Love that is grounded in God's Love is nourishing. The love that the world markets at its core is like a leech, always looking for opportunity to deplete and take more and more without regard for return. But when God is at the core of love, there is a freedom to give and be what the other person needs without any consideration for the return, because the entire experience is enveloped in mutuality.
Mutuality is not the same as equality. Men can handle physical things that a woman was not designed to handle, and women can handle physical things that a man was not designed to handle. Here again, the secular world attempts to rebrand what God created. Men and women are designed by God with specific intention, and there are some distinct differences both in physical characteristics and skill sets. For example: A man's body is not designed or equipped to bring a living breathing life into this world, but a woman's body is built receive the seed, to carry the developing life, deliver the person into this world, and to feed the new person until the person is able to eat from other food sources. God designs with intention.
Each gender brings something complementary to the characteristics of the other. This is by God's design. Men and women were never created to contradict each other nor to be in competition with each other, but were created to contrast each other in a way that draws emphasis that displays the other. Men and women were designed to compliment each other.
The secular world screams for equality, but God's economy of love was created for us to bring to the other person what they dont have within their own self. This is what physical attraction is about and is at the core necessity of intimacy. Society attempts to devalue what is the most priceless part of how God created male and female, with distinction. Yes, there are plenty of things that a man can do just as well as a women, and there are plenty of things that a woman can do just as well as a man. But, when it is all said and done, we were not created for sameness, so even in having some of the same skill sets and many features in common, we are different and where created for the purpose of being what the other needs, but does not contain within self.
We must be careful not to allow similar skill sets to appear to be signs of compatibility. Team members often have the same strengths and the same passion, but each also has to bring something that the other does not have or possess. This is what makes the team a well functioning unit and a couple is a well functioning unit, a team.
This is why it is important to be equally yoked, for the productivity of the team (2 Corinthians 6:14). Both spiritually and naturally, this is important. When your life is connected to the life of another person, you have to agree on which direction and for what you are working towards. Common sense would tell you that you cant have one person wanting to go North and the other person wanting to go South, because then all of their energy is depleted in the internal struggle of the team not going the same direction. When there is a tug of war in a relationship, sadly, someone wins. And this means that someone is losing ground on the direction they want to go towards. This changes what should be a win-win into a win-lose. This is why it is so important to attach your life to someone who is spiritually going the same direction as yourself. When both individuals are determined to go in the same direction, then there is an agreement of effort that become empowering, because both are using their strengths and skills to move forward. The team wins together.
Traditional marriage is attacked because it is evident how strong a well working unit is in accomplishing anything that the team sets its mind to accomplish. God created marriage that way, and God designed it so that LOVE is central to motivate the individuals to withstand the most challenging of times and situations to stay focused on the end result of the family.
Growing together in God is empowering. With the love of Jesus Christ and the power of the Holy Ghost, the Christian couple is unified and formidable .
Godly love has a ripple affect of blessings in the life of the Christian.
December 24, 2017
Trust is an Issue
I am very analytical. I overthink some of the most basic details of things. This is a most honest self assessment. Meaning I am the person who can literally stand in a fast food restaurant and think through all of the pro and cons of any menu item, and each and every combination of items that might contain too many calories or make me too full or make me sluggish or maybe cost more than I want to spend for fast food, or maybe might make a mess in the car, or whether I want to or have time to sit inside the restaurant and eat, or if I sit inside the restaurant what type of activities might be going on around me that I dont want to eat around, and on and on and on.
So when I say that I have put some thought to something, that is very much the case. I assess situations like a Rubics Cube. I look at things from all sides and angles and possible meanings and outcomes. This can be to a fault. This type of other thinking can be paralyzing on so many levels. It is a good skill to have because of the type of work that I do because the attention to detail is essential. But for the most basic things in life, I work at not having to think so hard as if it is a journey towards some sort of bliss.
Yes, I have to work on conditioning my mind to not overthink things. Even at this moment, I am writing as form of processing information, which is usually the case. But on today when I have worked an extremely long day, and still have a lot on my mind, I am sitting up writing to sort through my thoughts so that hopefully I will be able to settle down my mind enough to relax and find my way to sleep.
What does all of this have to do with trust? Absolutely everything. When you notice the smallest details, it leads you have sufficient pieces of information to assess and analyze in a way that most people just skim over. And I like most women often have these fairytales playing out in my head of perfect endings and spectacular outcomes. Here in is the foundation to the issues that I have with trust. After much thought, those perfect outcomes turn into realistic reality.
After realizing that I have been replaying this perfect outcome in my head for a few years now, I finally came to the conclusion that holding on to this fairytale ending was draining because when I put it to the reality test, I realized that at the most basic core of the reality is a lack of trust.
A lack of trust really has very little to do with guilt or innocence, perception or deception, but trust is an internal working of the individual. In this way, my inability to fully trust the person or the situation means that there is already a breach, a gapping hole in the fort.
When there is no trust, or even when trust is questionable, there are way to many opportunities for a person with trust issues to find reasons for trust to deplete or simply not be present at all.
Once I realized that my inability to trust in this situation was going to be problematic in a way that would manifest in so many other areas, then I decided to completely throw away my fairytale ending, because it would be like have a Bentley with no tires and no keys...... pointless bragging rights.
Theologically, I had tried to justify my hanging on to hope because I trust God. So that became my blanket assessment of the situation. After years of hoping against hope, I realized that I will continue to trust God regardless. Trusting God is so very different from putting your trust in a person or a situation. There are no guarantees in life, but some times the most trusting thing you can do is realize that God is still on the throne and still in control. So even if I dont get a fairytale ending, staying in a mindset of being able to trust God is most important.
Truth is, everybody and every situation is not deserving of your trust and most fairytales turn into reality sooner or later anyway. So facing reality and learning how to allow wisdom to develop your process and ability to trust means facing facts not vicarious ideals.
After all, God's Truth is based on the facts.
So when I say that I have put some thought to something, that is very much the case. I assess situations like a Rubics Cube. I look at things from all sides and angles and possible meanings and outcomes. This can be to a fault. This type of other thinking can be paralyzing on so many levels. It is a good skill to have because of the type of work that I do because the attention to detail is essential. But for the most basic things in life, I work at not having to think so hard as if it is a journey towards some sort of bliss.
Yes, I have to work on conditioning my mind to not overthink things. Even at this moment, I am writing as form of processing information, which is usually the case. But on today when I have worked an extremely long day, and still have a lot on my mind, I am sitting up writing to sort through my thoughts so that hopefully I will be able to settle down my mind enough to relax and find my way to sleep.
What does all of this have to do with trust? Absolutely everything. When you notice the smallest details, it leads you have sufficient pieces of information to assess and analyze in a way that most people just skim over. And I like most women often have these fairytales playing out in my head of perfect endings and spectacular outcomes. Here in is the foundation to the issues that I have with trust. After much thought, those perfect outcomes turn into realistic reality.
After realizing that I have been replaying this perfect outcome in my head for a few years now, I finally came to the conclusion that holding on to this fairytale ending was draining because when I put it to the reality test, I realized that at the most basic core of the reality is a lack of trust.
A lack of trust really has very little to do with guilt or innocence, perception or deception, but trust is an internal working of the individual. In this way, my inability to fully trust the person or the situation means that there is already a breach, a gapping hole in the fort.
When there is no trust, or even when trust is questionable, there are way to many opportunities for a person with trust issues to find reasons for trust to deplete or simply not be present at all.
Once I realized that my inability to trust in this situation was going to be problematic in a way that would manifest in so many other areas, then I decided to completely throw away my fairytale ending, because it would be like have a Bentley with no tires and no keys...... pointless bragging rights.
Theologically, I had tried to justify my hanging on to hope because I trust God. So that became my blanket assessment of the situation. After years of hoping against hope, I realized that I will continue to trust God regardless. Trusting God is so very different from putting your trust in a person or a situation. There are no guarantees in life, but some times the most trusting thing you can do is realize that God is still on the throne and still in control. So even if I dont get a fairytale ending, staying in a mindset of being able to trust God is most important.
Truth is, everybody and every situation is not deserving of your trust and most fairytales turn into reality sooner or later anyway. So facing reality and learning how to allow wisdom to develop your process and ability to trust means facing facts not vicarious ideals.
After all, God's Truth is based on the facts.
December 2, 2017
CONVICTION
Sin is an addiction. The causes and affects are both spiritual and natural. Just like any other addiction, the addict feels justified because of their inability to believe that life could be better without the sin. For the person who is entangled in sin, it is the sin that they feel like makes one feel alive. The person can not imagine feeling more alive by a life without sin. This is what gives the sinner the joy of sinning, the urge to sin, and the sense of normalcy while living out their favorite sin or sins.
Just like any other type of addiction, the individual can change, can give up the addiction and live a life of normal activity that may actually include the chosen thing or behavior, but in a different context. The amazing thing about sin and sinful nature is that it is caused by a distortion of thought and a distortion of the context. Most sins are taking something that is a normal healthy behavior and causing it to have more control over the individual than the individual has over one's self. Sin at its core is a lack of self control that is guided toward what is outside of the Will of God.
Let's take Gluttony for example. I will not describe it because, depending on the individual, it can take on many forms of manifestation in one's life---- for this reason I will simply note the reference 1 John 2 and what is referred to as 'pride of life'. In this way, it can be said that sin is selfish, having little to no regard for others or how one's behavior or mindset affects others. In other words, having the same characteristics of any other addiction. I wont bore with talk of dopamine and neurotransmitters. But just like any other addiction, science has shown that the chemicals in the brain are released that make the individual feel like there is reward in fulfilling craved addiction. This is what makes the sin seem like a thrill, and makes the person feel alive. The problem is that the feeling wears off, and this make the need for the behavior to become repetitive/a cycle, in other words, a sinful lifestyle.
One's way of thinking has to be distorted to justify the sin. This is why you can point out the sin to the individual without the person ever giving any real thought or consideration to your words or the option to change. We all want to believe that human beings can self regulate and make some basic auto-adjustments, but when it comes to sin and immorality for real change to take place the person has to be convicted.
The legal system has given us a very different understanding of conviction than that which is actually true from a spiritual perspective. In the court system the individual is tried by a jury of their peers. In this way, the burden is on proving to the jurors enough evidence to make a decision about the individual's guilt or innocence. This is why people who are in a sinful lifestyle can engage the conversation about their sin, because they are waiting for someone to convince them that what they are thinking or doing is wrong. And this is also when you will hear someone say, 'you cant make me feel guilty', letting you know that the individual is untouched by your defense of what is right. This is also the reason why, if we are not careful, we as Christians can spend a lot of time and energy trying to convince someone to give up one's sin, in hopes that something that we say might be just what is needed to convince the person to see their ways and make the necessary changes on their own.
The individual can not even hear or give any validity to what is being said to them until they have found God. Until then the ways of thinking are distorted in favor of the sin. To spiritually auto-correct is not possible, as much as we would want for the person to auto-correct, change cant not happen until there is pneuma experience. If the individual could change on their own, then that would imply that the person could be self saving, which goes completely against the Christian understanding of conversion and salvation. But when the individual has a moment of clarity that can only come from an experience with the Holy Spirit of God, there is an awareness of one's ideas and behaviors as God sees them.
This is the reason why we keep telling the Truth of God to individuals who brush it off or just dont want to do what is right. This is the Great Commission (Matthew 28), and this is what motivates the preacher to continue to preach.
Conviction, in the context of Christianity, is when the individual, internally, is convinced that self is guilty of sin. Then the individual is able to hear the evidence as presented according to God's true knowledge of the details, which brings about the desire to change. This change is to completely turn away from the sinful nature, through repentance. True repentance (action of change) can not happen until the person has been convicted (found self guilty), and makes an intelligent decision to completely surrender to God and be converted (persuaded to change).
Change is possible. Sinners can give up sin. This belief is at the core of Christianity because Christianity is build around the understanding of Salvation. And Christian salvation requires Jesus Christ. To accept Jesus Christ is to admit to God that there is a need that is bigger than self and what one can do or provide for one's self. It is this reliance that gives the Christian the strength to live a life that is not controlled by the addiction of sin. It is to be humbled, to let go of the pride of life. It is to realize that one needs God more than the sin. It is to realize that God is the giver of life, and makes one not just feel alive briefly, but to live truly alive with New Life that spans eternity.
As a little girl, I can remember people literally walking in off the street and proclaiming with a loud voice that they wanted to be saved. Often times this would happen during the altar call, when the preacher would say, 'if your soul should be required of you today, this very hour, would you be ready to answer the call?'
Someone walking down the street could hear what was going on inside, but this day something happened that had never happened before. Many of them had walked by the church often because it was in their neighborhood, but when blinders were removed and the soul was willing to hear what God had been saying, the individual became aware of their guilt of sin and wanted to change, wanted to be free from the thing that had control over their life. The individual was able to see that the feeling of being alive that they were experiencing by being controlled by their sin was no longer as appealing as the search to find out what it was really like to be free from the bondage of sin and know truly what it was like to be alive, to be born again, given a new life in Jesus Christ.
Just like any other type of addiction, the individual can change, can give up the addiction and live a life of normal activity that may actually include the chosen thing or behavior, but in a different context. The amazing thing about sin and sinful nature is that it is caused by a distortion of thought and a distortion of the context. Most sins are taking something that is a normal healthy behavior and causing it to have more control over the individual than the individual has over one's self. Sin at its core is a lack of self control that is guided toward what is outside of the Will of God.
Let's take Gluttony for example. I will not describe it because, depending on the individual, it can take on many forms of manifestation in one's life---- for this reason I will simply note the reference 1 John 2 and what is referred to as 'pride of life'. In this way, it can be said that sin is selfish, having little to no regard for others or how one's behavior or mindset affects others. In other words, having the same characteristics of any other addiction. I wont bore with talk of dopamine and neurotransmitters. But just like any other addiction, science has shown that the chemicals in the brain are released that make the individual feel like there is reward in fulfilling craved addiction. This is what makes the sin seem like a thrill, and makes the person feel alive. The problem is that the feeling wears off, and this make the need for the behavior to become repetitive/a cycle, in other words, a sinful lifestyle.
One's way of thinking has to be distorted to justify the sin. This is why you can point out the sin to the individual without the person ever giving any real thought or consideration to your words or the option to change. We all want to believe that human beings can self regulate and make some basic auto-adjustments, but when it comes to sin and immorality for real change to take place the person has to be convicted.
The legal system has given us a very different understanding of conviction than that which is actually true from a spiritual perspective. In the court system the individual is tried by a jury of their peers. In this way, the burden is on proving to the jurors enough evidence to make a decision about the individual's guilt or innocence. This is why people who are in a sinful lifestyle can engage the conversation about their sin, because they are waiting for someone to convince them that what they are thinking or doing is wrong. And this is also when you will hear someone say, 'you cant make me feel guilty', letting you know that the individual is untouched by your defense of what is right. This is also the reason why, if we are not careful, we as Christians can spend a lot of time and energy trying to convince someone to give up one's sin, in hopes that something that we say might be just what is needed to convince the person to see their ways and make the necessary changes on their own.
The individual can not even hear or give any validity to what is being said to them until they have found God. Until then the ways of thinking are distorted in favor of the sin. To spiritually auto-correct is not possible, as much as we would want for the person to auto-correct, change cant not happen until there is pneuma experience. If the individual could change on their own, then that would imply that the person could be self saving, which goes completely against the Christian understanding of conversion and salvation. But when the individual has a moment of clarity that can only come from an experience with the Holy Spirit of God, there is an awareness of one's ideas and behaviors as God sees them.
This is the reason why we keep telling the Truth of God to individuals who brush it off or just dont want to do what is right. This is the Great Commission (Matthew 28), and this is what motivates the preacher to continue to preach.
Conviction, in the context of Christianity, is when the individual, internally, is convinced that self is guilty of sin. Then the individual is able to hear the evidence as presented according to God's true knowledge of the details, which brings about the desire to change. This change is to completely turn away from the sinful nature, through repentance. True repentance (action of change) can not happen until the person has been convicted (found self guilty), and makes an intelligent decision to completely surrender to God and be converted (persuaded to change).
Change is possible. Sinners can give up sin. This belief is at the core of Christianity because Christianity is build around the understanding of Salvation. And Christian salvation requires Jesus Christ. To accept Jesus Christ is to admit to God that there is a need that is bigger than self and what one can do or provide for one's self. It is this reliance that gives the Christian the strength to live a life that is not controlled by the addiction of sin. It is to be humbled, to let go of the pride of life. It is to realize that one needs God more than the sin. It is to realize that God is the giver of life, and makes one not just feel alive briefly, but to live truly alive with New Life that spans eternity.
As a little girl, I can remember people literally walking in off the street and proclaiming with a loud voice that they wanted to be saved. Often times this would happen during the altar call, when the preacher would say, 'if your soul should be required of you today, this very hour, would you be ready to answer the call?'
Someone walking down the street could hear what was going on inside, but this day something happened that had never happened before. Many of them had walked by the church often because it was in their neighborhood, but when blinders were removed and the soul was willing to hear what God had been saying, the individual became aware of their guilt of sin and wanted to change, wanted to be free from the thing that had control over their life. The individual was able to see that the feeling of being alive that they were experiencing by being controlled by their sin was no longer as appealing as the search to find out what it was really like to be free from the bondage of sin and know truly what it was like to be alive, to be born again, given a new life in Jesus Christ.
October 16, 2017
Parts and Divides
This past weekend something came to my mind that I really hadnt thought much about in years. It was a very hurtful and devastating phase of my life. It doesnt take up much space in my thoughts because it is in the past; and God got me through the situation and beyond the situation.
But today, as I reflect, I think about how faithful God was to me in the midst of a great trying time in my life. Against all odds, God provided for me as a single mother. There were times and challenges, and there still are, but through it all God has been faithful. My testimony is a very amazing one. It causes me to stand in awe of how great God truly has been to me. It has given me such a grateful heart. It has also shown me how to be ok with and without over the years.
Just thinking about how badly things could have gone for me is enough to make what I survived even more amazing. God's hand of protection was with me through some things that seem to be more dramatic than anything in a movie plot. But sometimes reality is more extreme than anything a movie writer can formulate for the big screen.
Even some of the things that I am currently dealing with fall under the category of 'troubled on every side, yet not distressed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed.' Adversaries thought I would be destroyed, but what they found out was that God has created me to be formidable. Storms have been brewing all around me and God has given me so much grace that I am watching it all take place as if I have a great seat in a theater in the round.
When I think about the characteristics of God, I have to remember that along with being a Creator and Sustainer, God is also a Divider and a Separator. Initially these may seem to be negatives, but when we read God's Word, we see in the the very beginning of creation God divided light from darkness. This can lead to a plethora of theological and homiletic themes. Much of the biblical text carries out this theme of separation that God makes dividing lines, if you will.
The parting of the Red Sea is talked about in terms of its miracle quality, but we must not forget the logistical components of God being able to divide. This is proof that God can part or separate anything that God so desires. This kind of divide meant that not only did the water divide, but every creature and composition within the ecological environment of the sea. What was created by God, must submit to God's command. What an awesome thought. What a humbling thought.
Whatever the situation, all that is needed is for God to speak. God clearly makes distinctions at times to accomplish the Will and Purpose of God. It may be temporary and it may be permanent. But it is God's pleasure that the creation must obey. This has been true in many of the fine details of my life. I thank God for keeping me separated from foolishness. God has done some things that can only be credited to the ONE, the TRUE, and LIVING GOD.
But today, as I reflect, I think about how faithful God was to me in the midst of a great trying time in my life. Against all odds, God provided for me as a single mother. There were times and challenges, and there still are, but through it all God has been faithful. My testimony is a very amazing one. It causes me to stand in awe of how great God truly has been to me. It has given me such a grateful heart. It has also shown me how to be ok with and without over the years.
Just thinking about how badly things could have gone for me is enough to make what I survived even more amazing. God's hand of protection was with me through some things that seem to be more dramatic than anything in a movie plot. But sometimes reality is more extreme than anything a movie writer can formulate for the big screen.
Even some of the things that I am currently dealing with fall under the category of 'troubled on every side, yet not distressed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed.' Adversaries thought I would be destroyed, but what they found out was that God has created me to be formidable. Storms have been brewing all around me and God has given me so much grace that I am watching it all take place as if I have a great seat in a theater in the round.
When I think about the characteristics of God, I have to remember that along with being a Creator and Sustainer, God is also a Divider and a Separator. Initially these may seem to be negatives, but when we read God's Word, we see in the the very beginning of creation God divided light from darkness. This can lead to a plethora of theological and homiletic themes. Much of the biblical text carries out this theme of separation that God makes dividing lines, if you will.
The parting of the Red Sea is talked about in terms of its miracle quality, but we must not forget the logistical components of God being able to divide. This is proof that God can part or separate anything that God so desires. This kind of divide meant that not only did the water divide, but every creature and composition within the ecological environment of the sea. What was created by God, must submit to God's command. What an awesome thought. What a humbling thought.
Whatever the situation, all that is needed is for God to speak. God clearly makes distinctions at times to accomplish the Will and Purpose of God. It may be temporary and it may be permanent. But it is God's pleasure that the creation must obey. This has been true in many of the fine details of my life. I thank God for keeping me separated from foolishness. God has done some things that can only be credited to the ONE, the TRUE, and LIVING GOD.
September 1, 2017
Unplanned PLAN
There are clearly some things that were not in my plans for my life, but they were ultimately part of God's Plan for my life. Today I have really been giving some thought to my journey. Recently, it would seem that things are going exactly the way that I was trying to prevent having to deal with. I want the final outcome, but not the challenges that would be the risk of losing something to gain something. Not in the same way that I invest in products for my business to be able to provide a service to my clients. But more like a mother who wants to have a new baby, but does not want to feel the pains of labor.
In recent years, there have been medical advances that have taken away the necessity of enduring the pain of labor. And overall, our world is filled with comforts that take the work out of many of the every day processes of life. Washing machines, electric saws, power tools, and on and on. I think back to learning how to make cake icing, and the process required this combination of mixing and whisking to blend the ingredients, and even after they were blended, you had to whisk the mixture at least 100 strokes to make the icing have the correct fluffy texture. And even now that I have many of the electric kitchen tools, there are some things that to me just dont come out the same without the work of doing it by hand, and icing is one of those things.
So we have become so accustomed to the world of convenience that we often forget that some things have no shortcut process that will produce the same results as going through the process. Just like icing or grilling meat low and slow over charcoal, there are some things in life that have to happen a certain way for the most rewarding outcome. And as I was thinking about the events of my life in recent days, I began to reminisce on the book by Zora Neale Hurston, "Their Eyes Were Watching God" which is about a main character who is living her life, but surrounded by spectators who all have an opinion about her life, as if they understand her journey more so than she. The character navigates her life, its ups and downs working through the challenges as they come to her reality, as she is finding her way.
In this same way, each of us has our journey through life to navigate and it is very much an individual process that happens while simultaneously being surround by community. When someone has a call to ministry on their life, it can be assumed that God has a plan for that person's life. No matter how much anyone has an opinion about what that looks like, it is God who is taking care of the details. To grow to the point of being able to flourish in one's gifts and live out one's calling, there are some parts of the journey that are growing one's skills for ministry. This means that it will not always flow with the ease of water going down hill. There will be times when one will have to face some things head on and take the challenge to grow, if one is really surrendered to the point of allowing God to be in control of what is ultimately God's Will for one's life in ministry.
From point A to point B, is not always clear, there will be times when one will have to whole-heartedly trust God for the details to work out as planned by God, not by our idea of how things should go. I have been asking God to show me how to get to point B without the discomfort of the middle part of the process. The discomfort is part of the journey, it is what make the reward worth the effort. Just like a track runner who wants to be the fasted, it cant happen sitting in the stands, but it happens by learning everything necessary to sharpen one's natural ability and from running until time gets better.
The challenges we face in life are not always ideal, nor comfortable to go through, but when you want the outcome badly enough, you decide to face the challenge head on and take the bad with the good, because it will be worth it all in the end. Today, I decided that I am up for challenge of facing the discomfort that will only have to be endure for a short time to get what I ultimately want to see manifested in my life. The discomfort cant be avoided, it is part of the path that leads me right to where God is taking me.
Psalms 23:4 - "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me."
It is not actual death, it is just a shadow and shadows only produce fear when you dont know what it is a shadow of or from what source. Since I know that it has been my own fear, I can ignore the shadow. I will continue on toward what God has for me. I want God's best for my life because it will be worth the challenges along to way and shadows let me know that God's Light is what is real.
August 24, 2017
Insomnia
It is 1:30am and I cant sleep.
I have so many thought in my mind right now. I spend so much of my prayer life interceding for the needs of others that I often forget to really spend time praying about the things that I need in my own life.
And this is why being awake right now is so frustrating to me. Usually when I wake up in the middle of the night, I pray for the people and the situations that have been on my mind during the day or that come to my mind when I wake up. But when I woke up this time, my mind was flooded with thoughts of things that I need in my own life.
In the clinical world of providing services to others, there is an emphasis on self care. It is the understanding that you cant give to others if you not keeping yourself in a good place mentally, emotionally and spiritually. The most basic example of this would be to think about the speech that they give you on the airplane about what to do in case of emergency. The instructions are to give yourself oxogen first, then share the oxogen with those around you. In this way, you are more capable when you have what you need.
And this would be the sum total of why I am awake in the middle of the night. I am being forced to face the truth of my own life. I have spent the last few years frustrated with myself because I know that I am not reaching my fullest potential, nor am I achieving at the rate that I should have been. And like a perfect storm of reality checks, it is clear to me that I am not getting what I need to flourish. I have just been existing and trying to function as if it has been sufficient and it has not been and the state of my life is proof of that fact.
So now, I am awake creating an order of importance for the things that I need to do for my self, for my own life. There are some voids in my own life that I need to give some attention to so that I can be nourished and therefore function at a higher level of efficiency. It is not being selfish in a way that doesnt care for others, but it is being selfish in a way that will help me to care for others better.
I have so many thought in my mind right now. I spend so much of my prayer life interceding for the needs of others that I often forget to really spend time praying about the things that I need in my own life.
And this is why being awake right now is so frustrating to me. Usually when I wake up in the middle of the night, I pray for the people and the situations that have been on my mind during the day or that come to my mind when I wake up. But when I woke up this time, my mind was flooded with thoughts of things that I need in my own life.
In the clinical world of providing services to others, there is an emphasis on self care. It is the understanding that you cant give to others if you not keeping yourself in a good place mentally, emotionally and spiritually. The most basic example of this would be to think about the speech that they give you on the airplane about what to do in case of emergency. The instructions are to give yourself oxogen first, then share the oxogen with those around you. In this way, you are more capable when you have what you need.
And this would be the sum total of why I am awake in the middle of the night. I am being forced to face the truth of my own life. I have spent the last few years frustrated with myself because I know that I am not reaching my fullest potential, nor am I achieving at the rate that I should have been. And like a perfect storm of reality checks, it is clear to me that I am not getting what I need to flourish. I have just been existing and trying to function as if it has been sufficient and it has not been and the state of my life is proof of that fact.
So now, I am awake creating an order of importance for the things that I need to do for my self, for my own life. There are some voids in my own life that I need to give some attention to so that I can be nourished and therefore function at a higher level of efficiency. It is not being selfish in a way that doesnt care for others, but it is being selfish in a way that will help me to care for others better.
May 22, 2017
Spirituality and Sexuality - Part 1
For some days now I have been thinking about writing on the topic of love, but instead I am going to try to tackle a much more intense topic that is rarely discussed from a Christian spiritual frame of thinking. It will probably take more than one post to really begin to unpack this topic, because there are a lot of variables that can play out, both naturally and spiritually.
Sex is not often talked about by Christians as a positive. Most of the time when it is discussed in church, it is from the list of dont do. So even when Christians get married, they enter into marriage not knowing much about how sacred the sexual act of intercourse really is for both of them.
There needs to be more clarity given to the difference in the sacred act of intercourse in marriage and the physical sport of casual sexual behavior that is so common in our culture today. The bible is constantly talking about the flesh in the New Testament. This is for a very good reason.
You need your senses to be aware of the natural world around you as well as to be aware of the spiritual world around you. If you allow your senses to control you, then you will become desensitized to what is going on around you, both naturally and spiritually. You have to be the controller of your flesh, you can not allow your flesh to control you.
In the context of a monogamous marriage, the senses are strengthened and not depleted. This is because the man and the woman are sharing a sacred sexual experience. They are becoming unified and this level of unity manifest in every aspect of their lives as individuals and as a couple. This is why you will hear married people begin to use the same vocabulary and phrases, and even begin to communicate much more non verbally, as they become in tune with each other.
Pastors can look at the couples in their congregation and see which couples are truly unified and which couples are trying to pretend to be unified. When a couple is not equally yoked it is obvious, it shows in many ways, but most importantly it shows in what they are able to accomplish in their walk with Christ, and in their individual callings.
Sexual intercourse is not only the sharing of the physical body, but it is also the sharing of that person's spiritual self. So the person who has multiple sexual partners is becoming sexually schizophrenic. When you share your essence with someone, you are basically giving and receiving. You are giving away some of who you are spiritually and receiving some of who that person is spiritually. So when you are sexual with a person who does not view their own body as sacred and spiritually connected to God, then you are devaluing your own body and spirit.
In church, the message is to avoid being 'unequally yoked', or a more modern way to say it to say dont be tied to someone who is not a spiritual match. The yoke is an apparatus that is used to tie two working animals together so that the strength of them both can be used to increase the productivity by powering the load to be pulled by the strength of the unified effort. If one is too much stronger than the other, the stronger one will tire too quickly from taking too much of the labor load, and will eventually be dragging not only the weight of the load, but of the other animal too. This will not only make the progress take longer, but will eventually bring the work to a complete stop, much sooner than if the two animals are more equal in strength.
Take that and apply it to a marriage, and you can have two people who are on the same path and level of awareness spiritually and they can accomplish much more, and much faster than they could as individuals working solo. But if one of the people in the marriage is spending all of their prayer life and the spiritual awareness trying to drag someone along the path to spiritual growth, they risk becoming tired and unable to accomplish very much for the Kingdom because their spouse is lagging behind and as a team, they cant go any faster or any farther than the weaker, slower person is able or willing.
In seminary, one of the counseling classes that I had to take was Spirituality and Sexuality. This class was a lot of information about the functions of the body and how to minister to people who were dealing with various sexual issues and concerns. But when the instructors started talking about how you must understand that you are who you share your body with because you are sharing spiritually because sex is a spiritual act, I realized that in my upbringing this had not been discussed, but on some level it made total sense.
This is why those who are the most depleted as individuals are those who have given themselves away freely, and who are also the most empty spiritually and emotionally. The constant search for what can only be found in God is what the they are actually trying to find in another empty person. And two empty people can only share their emptiness. And the more empty the individual feels, the more they seek after someone to make them feel better, to feel full. It becomes a sad and dangerous cycle.
For a person to value your body, they must value their own. The person must see their sexuality as a sacred expression, not to be shared with just anyone and not to be shared with someone who is not on the same spiritual path. If a person shares their body with some who is spiritually schizophrenic, then the individual is welcoming all of those spirits that the other person has into their being as well. When this happens, all the spirits become familiar. When the spirits all become familiar, then the senses dont become alarmed and are no longer alert to the danger. As a matter of fact, because the spirits seem familiar, they will also seem to be safe. In other words, the spiritual attack is not an aggressive or violent one, but a gentle sensual one.
The bible lets us know that the marriage bed is undefiled, because the expectation is of respect for the body as sacred, and respect for the sexual experience of the marriage to be free from the residue of other people's spiritual residue. Therefore sacred sexuality is in the context of a monogamous marriage between spiritual equals. Even if they are not equals, they become equally what each person brings into the covenant bond. In this way , the marriage changes both the man and the woman into the version of self that is enmeshed with what they share with their spouse.
Sex is not often talked about by Christians as a positive. Most of the time when it is discussed in church, it is from the list of dont do. So even when Christians get married, they enter into marriage not knowing much about how sacred the sexual act of intercourse really is for both of them.
There needs to be more clarity given to the difference in the sacred act of intercourse in marriage and the physical sport of casual sexual behavior that is so common in our culture today. The bible is constantly talking about the flesh in the New Testament. This is for a very good reason.
You need your senses to be aware of the natural world around you as well as to be aware of the spiritual world around you. If you allow your senses to control you, then you will become desensitized to what is going on around you, both naturally and spiritually. You have to be the controller of your flesh, you can not allow your flesh to control you.
In the context of a monogamous marriage, the senses are strengthened and not depleted. This is because the man and the woman are sharing a sacred sexual experience. They are becoming unified and this level of unity manifest in every aspect of their lives as individuals and as a couple. This is why you will hear married people begin to use the same vocabulary and phrases, and even begin to communicate much more non verbally, as they become in tune with each other.
Pastors can look at the couples in their congregation and see which couples are truly unified and which couples are trying to pretend to be unified. When a couple is not equally yoked it is obvious, it shows in many ways, but most importantly it shows in what they are able to accomplish in their walk with Christ, and in their individual callings.
Sexual intercourse is not only the sharing of the physical body, but it is also the sharing of that person's spiritual self. So the person who has multiple sexual partners is becoming sexually schizophrenic. When you share your essence with someone, you are basically giving and receiving. You are giving away some of who you are spiritually and receiving some of who that person is spiritually. So when you are sexual with a person who does not view their own body as sacred and spiritually connected to God, then you are devaluing your own body and spirit.
In church, the message is to avoid being 'unequally yoked', or a more modern way to say it to say dont be tied to someone who is not a spiritual match. The yoke is an apparatus that is used to tie two working animals together so that the strength of them both can be used to increase the productivity by powering the load to be pulled by the strength of the unified effort. If one is too much stronger than the other, the stronger one will tire too quickly from taking too much of the labor load, and will eventually be dragging not only the weight of the load, but of the other animal too. This will not only make the progress take longer, but will eventually bring the work to a complete stop, much sooner than if the two animals are more equal in strength.
Take that and apply it to a marriage, and you can have two people who are on the same path and level of awareness spiritually and they can accomplish much more, and much faster than they could as individuals working solo. But if one of the people in the marriage is spending all of their prayer life and the spiritual awareness trying to drag someone along the path to spiritual growth, they risk becoming tired and unable to accomplish very much for the Kingdom because their spouse is lagging behind and as a team, they cant go any faster or any farther than the weaker, slower person is able or willing.
In seminary, one of the counseling classes that I had to take was Spirituality and Sexuality. This class was a lot of information about the functions of the body and how to minister to people who were dealing with various sexual issues and concerns. But when the instructors started talking about how you must understand that you are who you share your body with because you are sharing spiritually because sex is a spiritual act, I realized that in my upbringing this had not been discussed, but on some level it made total sense.
This is why those who are the most depleted as individuals are those who have given themselves away freely, and who are also the most empty spiritually and emotionally. The constant search for what can only be found in God is what the they are actually trying to find in another empty person. And two empty people can only share their emptiness. And the more empty the individual feels, the more they seek after someone to make them feel better, to feel full. It becomes a sad and dangerous cycle.
For a person to value your body, they must value their own. The person must see their sexuality as a sacred expression, not to be shared with just anyone and not to be shared with someone who is not on the same spiritual path. If a person shares their body with some who is spiritually schizophrenic, then the individual is welcoming all of those spirits that the other person has into their being as well. When this happens, all the spirits become familiar. When the spirits all become familiar, then the senses dont become alarmed and are no longer alert to the danger. As a matter of fact, because the spirits seem familiar, they will also seem to be safe. In other words, the spiritual attack is not an aggressive or violent one, but a gentle sensual one.
The bible lets us know that the marriage bed is undefiled, because the expectation is of respect for the body as sacred, and respect for the sexual experience of the marriage to be free from the residue of other people's spiritual residue. Therefore sacred sexuality is in the context of a monogamous marriage between spiritual equals. Even if they are not equals, they become equally what each person brings into the covenant bond. In this way , the marriage changes both the man and the woman into the version of self that is enmeshed with what they share with their spouse.
May 16, 2017
Success is Relative
Success is relative. Each person has their own idea of success and each person has their own measure for where one is in the journey to accomplishment. One of the biggest mistakes that anyone can make is to measure one's own level of accomplishment by someone else's accomplishments in a different area or field.
Most of the time when envy and jealous occur it is because of comparing apples to oranges, not comparing the same skills and the same types of success to each other. One thing that I have noticed is that people who are striving for their own excellence dont really have the mental energy for such comparisons anyway. The most critical opinions come from the most stagnant people. And when I say stagnant, I dont mean this to imply that the person or persons have not accomplished, but that they realize their own limitations and have some sort of regret because of how their own life choices created those limitations.
The choices that a person makes can totally shift the events of the rest of one's life. The truth is that we can not see into the future and at the time that we make the decision, we feel it is the best decision or the right decision based on the current information that we have at the time. And in most cases, there are ways to adjust or modify the decision, but some times the decisions that we make just have to walk out and live with, accepting what it brings with it.
A spirit filled Christian should always be prayerful about major decisions. In this, one must be willing to be obedient to what the Holy Spirit is guiding one to do. When it comes to living out one's calling, this really cant be determined by anyone else. We live in a world that says that you must get the approval of others, but in truth, people may not always understand or agree with your calling. This can be challenging for the person who needs the affirmation of others to feel comfortable taking certain steps in life. It is normal for each of us to want to be loved and accepted, but we may not always get this from the people that we look to provide it for us.
Finding the love and support that one needs to nourish one's human need for affirmation and a sense of community can be challenging for us all, and especially for those who dont fit in with mediocrity. So may people who have gifts and callings to go farther and higher in areas of success dont do so because of the need for a sense of community, and the fear of being isolated in the process of reaching for more within the context of one's goals.
The truth is that one can not truly flourish and reach the fullest potential of one's own goals until one is really ready to let go of the atmosphere of mediocrity. Getting uncomfortable is what pushes one forward, gives one the determination to proceed regardless of the opinions of those who are comfortable in mediocrity. Along the way, one begins to meet others who are on similar journeys, and this provides a more natural and organic sense of community, a community of people who can understand and affirm the journey.
Let's be honest, everyone is not built for the same types of success. And some dont have the drive to go out into the unknown with the courage that it takes to face what others cant imagine. Most of the time, the people who discourage others from working toward their vision do so because it is not their vision. You cant expect people to understand what they cant see or imagine. Anyone who does not understand the vision will have a hard time being a part of your journey towards accomplishing it.
It is my prayer that the God given vision will take you into the fullness of following the calling and the gifts that God has place in this time and space for a reason. I pray that God surround you with people who understand what it is like to step out of the routine and reach for all that God has for you. True happiness is living affirmed in what God created you to do and to be.
Most of the time when envy and jealous occur it is because of comparing apples to oranges, not comparing the same skills and the same types of success to each other. One thing that I have noticed is that people who are striving for their own excellence dont really have the mental energy for such comparisons anyway. The most critical opinions come from the most stagnant people. And when I say stagnant, I dont mean this to imply that the person or persons have not accomplished, but that they realize their own limitations and have some sort of regret because of how their own life choices created those limitations.
The choices that a person makes can totally shift the events of the rest of one's life. The truth is that we can not see into the future and at the time that we make the decision, we feel it is the best decision or the right decision based on the current information that we have at the time. And in most cases, there are ways to adjust or modify the decision, but some times the decisions that we make just have to walk out and live with, accepting what it brings with it.
A spirit filled Christian should always be prayerful about major decisions. In this, one must be willing to be obedient to what the Holy Spirit is guiding one to do. When it comes to living out one's calling, this really cant be determined by anyone else. We live in a world that says that you must get the approval of others, but in truth, people may not always understand or agree with your calling. This can be challenging for the person who needs the affirmation of others to feel comfortable taking certain steps in life. It is normal for each of us to want to be loved and accepted, but we may not always get this from the people that we look to provide it for us.
Finding the love and support that one needs to nourish one's human need for affirmation and a sense of community can be challenging for us all, and especially for those who dont fit in with mediocrity. So may people who have gifts and callings to go farther and higher in areas of success dont do so because of the need for a sense of community, and the fear of being isolated in the process of reaching for more within the context of one's goals.
The truth is that one can not truly flourish and reach the fullest potential of one's own goals until one is really ready to let go of the atmosphere of mediocrity. Getting uncomfortable is what pushes one forward, gives one the determination to proceed regardless of the opinions of those who are comfortable in mediocrity. Along the way, one begins to meet others who are on similar journeys, and this provides a more natural and organic sense of community, a community of people who can understand and affirm the journey.
Let's be honest, everyone is not built for the same types of success. And some dont have the drive to go out into the unknown with the courage that it takes to face what others cant imagine. Most of the time, the people who discourage others from working toward their vision do so because it is not their vision. You cant expect people to understand what they cant see or imagine. Anyone who does not understand the vision will have a hard time being a part of your journey towards accomplishing it.
It is my prayer that the God given vision will take you into the fullness of following the calling and the gifts that God has place in this time and space for a reason. I pray that God surround you with people who understand what it is like to step out of the routine and reach for all that God has for you. True happiness is living affirmed in what God created you to do and to be.
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