There is a saying. “ IF you get over on me once, shame one you. IF you get over on we twice, shame on me”.
But now the question that I am asking myself is what about time, 3 or 4…or even to the point of losing count??. Good Christian teaching is about forgiveness and redemption, but in the midst of all that, how many times do you really allow someone to have the chance to disappoint you. When is it appropriate for a good Christian to say, “I have had enough of this and I wont accept it any longer?”
I have known so many women who stayed in bad relationships for the reason of proving their Christianity by the ability to endure. Whenever I would speak to them about their situation, I would always talk about how a husband is to love his wife as Christ loves the Church. This kind of love does not intentionally harm or hurt others. There is a huge tension between ideology and reality. I don’t know where the two make peace and meet in a way that is reasonable.
IF you look to the bible for the answers concerning forgiveness, you find the concept of forgiving someone 70x7. So you should forgive someone 490 times? I cant help but to think that the point here is that true forgiveness will eventually lose count, and not that you reach your breaking point of not being able to forgive someone after the number of their offenses reach this special number.
Human relationships require a lot of work, even in good times. So what do you do when this work is strained all the more by one of the people involved repeatedly hurting the other – whether it be intentionally or unintentionally? My challenge to the person receiving the hurt is always to reaffirm value in self. Christ love for the church is affirming. Christ love is healing. Christ love does no intentional harm.
There is no easy absolute answer to how or what to do. But what is true and sure is that to find the answer you have to look to Christ. For it is through Christ and His LOVE, that you find the answers and the strength to walk in the plan of God for your life and to find the LOVE that God wants you to have in your life.
I believe that a person who harms others will have to answer to God. But I also believe that a person who allows self to be treated any less than what God would have for the individual to receive, will also answer to God for not living up to the sacredness of being created in God’s own image. For God loved God’s own image enough to share that with each of us. God loves, because God’s Love started with God’s Self.