Gender and Salvation

Contrary to what our society wants to tell us, there are some distinct differences in men and women. God created humanity this way for a reason. The differences are to compliment each other, they are not to make one gender more valid than the other, they are designed to work together to create balance in the home, family, community and society.

Within this understanding there are some things that are part of the personality of the individual, but for the most part at the core there are certain things that are key characteristics. God's creation is intentional, with so much attention to detail that some times it is hard to even wrap one's mind around all of the intricate care that God lovingly set in order to create the world that we live in and our human bodies designed just right for the atmosphere and gravity of the Earth.

There are some cognitive differences in men and women.  I wont bore with too much scientific fact, but I will say that in many cases men and women process information differently, and they respond to that information differently. Again, I will state that personality in the individual does play a key role in this, because each person has some unique qualities, as God did not create us as one clone, but part of the beautiful variety that is throughout creation. For example, all trees have the same basic features, but there are multiple varieties of trees, the same can be said of birds, flowers, on and on.... God clearly loves variety because it is expressed throughout creation. In this way, each individual is unique, but with some sameness of humanity.

Salvation is defined in the Westminster Dictionary of Theological Terms as follows:

"God's activities in bringing humans into a right relationship with God and with one another through Jesus Christ.  They are saved from the consequences of their sin and given eternal life. Biblical images for salvation vary widely." 


This definition uses some very active words. It also clearly states that salvation is more than just the relationship with God, but also with one another.  This is very important to understand the Christian community of faith that develops among those who are saved.  No where in this definition is a distinction of gender, which means that salvation is for both men and women.  But when we look at the  Christian community of faith, in almost all cases there are more women than men within congregations.

Salvation is available to all.  How men and women process information can be very different, especially when it comes to self introspection. This is important because when presenting the Gospel to men and women, there is some need for intentional use of facts, because men get details and facts in a very different way than women do. This is often reflected in communication styles.  Men want the bottom line fact first, and women can navigate through the details and eventually get to what should point to the facts.

For salvation to take place, one must be aware that one's relationship with God is not right. ... That one is a sinner. To acknowledge this fact in one's spiritual state of being requires conviction. Our legal system has lead us to think about conviction in a certain way, that relies on how the information is understood by others.  But the type of conviction that leads one to realize they  are in need of Jesus Christ and salvation, is internal. In other words, the facts have to be presented to the individual, not the group of peers.  The group of peers may see the facts without a shadow of a doubt, but for salvation to take place the individual must see one's own sinful nature as based on the facts presented to one's own self.  This level of self honesty means that the person must be humbled by the Holy Spirit of God opening ones eyes, to be honest with one's self about one's own actions and motives.

Conviction of sin is defined in the Westminster Dictionary of Theological Terms as follows:

"The sense of the reality of sin in one's life as known by the work of the Holy Spirit ( John 16: 8-9)."


When a person is unwilling to face the facts of their own wrong, it takes the Holy Spirit to show the individual how far way from God they truly are, how are away from doing right they truly are in their own way of being. Sinners and backsliders, are able to justify their ways, or the even ignore reasoning.  But once one truly becomes aware of the fact that one is wrong, in word and deed, something has to change. Either the individual will take the "Romans Road" or will continue to reject God, Jesus Christ, and salvation.

In recent years, the preaching of the Gospel has become quite docile when it comes to stating the facts. And this is reflected in the lack of men who are active participants in church. This is reflective of the lower numbers of men who are accepting salvation in Jesus Christ.  Maybe the "hell, fire, and brimstone" type sermon of the past seems a bit harsh, but some time the facts are harsh. Sin is harsh. The consequences of sin are harsh. What sin does to one's life is harsh. What sin does to one's physical body is harsh. What sin does to the state of one's soul is harsh.

Men must be presented with the facts. The church can not follow the trends of the world and sugar coat the truth. Men respect truth and honesty, even when it is not what they want to hear. No one  will receive the truth or the facts, until they are willing to surrender their own self sufficiency and realize that what is needed can not be supplied by self. But salvation is available to everyone, both men and women.   God is not hiding salvation from anyone, nor is God trying to make it an unsolvable riddle. The truth of the Gospel is plain and clearly states the facts.

Men may not like asking for help or directions, but when a man realizes that his soul is at stake, in danger, the urgency will become real.  A sin sick soul can only be healed by the Power of God, through the blood of Jesus Christ. A man can not save his own soul, a woman can not save her own soul.  We all need Jesus.

Eating Crow

To figure out that you are wrong about something may or may not be a big deal.  When this realization is a private one, it is only your own processing of the information that has to be taken into account.  But when you have to admit to others that you are wrong, the error in judgment, the details, and miscalculations take on a whole different level of internal response. Not only does one have to deal with the outcomes and need for adjustments because of the error, but there is also the added communication that others want to have about something that one would rather not talk about.


All of the thoughts of dread that go with the conversation about the error are not only unwanted, but can be overwhelming because of the multiple times that one repeatedly answers the same or similar questions about the matter. It becomes hard to navigate who is genuinely concerned and who is simply seeking out a juicy bit of information.

To talk about what has happened is part of the healing process. Each individual heals at their own pace, and therefore each individual is ready to talk about their miscalculation with no specific appropriate time frame to be determined as right or wrong by anyone else. Add to this the distinct differences in how men and women process information, respond to information, and need to talk to process information, and you have a variety of ways in which human beings deal with the mistakes that they make in life.


There are times when a person realizes their mistake but refuses to make the necessary adjustments because of pride. In some ways this can seem to others as form of stubbornness.  More often than not, the person who is processing their mistake and what making the needed changes entails wants to do so on their own terms and not the terms of others. This can be very stressful when others want to rush or force the transitions necessary to handle a mistake in one's own life. This will cause the individual to avoid making the necessary decisions because there is a sense that others are pressuring or attempting to orchestrate one's life for them. This pressure adds to the resistance by the individual to do what is necessary because that is a mechanism built into being stubborn in the process.

Theologically, when a person is walking in disobedience to God, not only is there the issue of stubbornness, but there is usually some sort of attempt to negotiate with God.  Negotiation, in many cases is caused by the unwillingness to trust God or to surrender to God's Will.  The mistakes that happen in one's life because of disobedience can be disheartening because the limitations of being human dont allow us to see into the future.  And many times, attempting to negotiate with God can lead us into situations that we could not have possibly seen coming.

On our best day, each of us wants to believe that we are up for any challenge and because of this we can sometimes believe that we can handle situations without realizing that God sees all sides of a situation and we are only able to see what is present before us at any given time.  Our speculations are not guarantees, but we yet have to make life decisions based on the information that we have, and this does not always work out the way that we planned. 

There are other times, when there are warning signs, and even divinely inspired clues that let us know that we should do things differently or make a different decisions but we dont always heed the warning signs. Often times, these warnings and clues come from those closest to us, friends and family.  And this can also become part of the challenge to figure out who is giving genuine insight or divinely inspired insight versus those who are giving advice based on how it will work best for themselves. Each of us usually knows who the self serving individuals are around us, be we can not always be 100% certain in every situation, because trust can sometimes be very fluid.

So when a situation does not go the way that one has planned, and this realization means that it is time to come to terms with the mistake and admit that it didnt work out as planned, this can sometimes be hard to admit.  And this is where the concept of 'Eating Crow' comes into being part of the reality that one must face.  The term comes from the fact that crow is not palatable or good tasting bird. It is said to have a bad smell and taste, and be very hard to digest. Being reduced to eating crow, means putting one's pride to the side.

As I said earlier, it is one thing to admit a mistake to yourself privately, but to admit a mistake to others takes on a whole other level of character building because mistakes rarely happen when or the way that we expect them to, simply because we rarely start anything hoping for a negative outcome, and most times we dont have a completed back up plan, we just make it up and adjust as we go.  So when others start asking questions that one does not want to answer, there is the additional stress of people asking questions that one has not had time to fully process or plan for alternative ways of dealing with the situation.  All of this can be overwhelming.

But this is what redemption is all about. God is always there to receive us and to help us get back on track.  Once we are willing to put our pride aside and acknowledge that we want and need God's guidance, God is faithful.  Even when there is residue from our mistakes on our lives, God is still there welcoming those who come back home.

THE STORY:

A young man bought a new boat. He was excited about the boat because he had plans of being a great fisherman.  He was going to take his new boat and the cute little kitten that he had found out to sea for the fishing season. 

Several people around him told him that they thought his boat was fine for staying close to the shore, but would not endure the long season in the deep waters miles away from the shore.  They also told him that the kitten was not a good idea because he would not want to be stuck out at sea with the kitten. 

The young man looked into the kitten's eyes and thought it most adorable and could not image how this kitten could become a problem out at sea.  He thought that he would be able to feed the kitten from his catch of fish and he had visions of both he and the kitten being happy keeping each other company during the fishing season. 

When the day came to begin his time out at sea, the young man happily told his friends that he would be fine, all the while they were still wondering how he was going to make it through the rough waters of the sea in his new boat with the kitten.   As the boat floated a couple of miles away from the shore,  the young man notices a small puddle of water on one end of the boat.  He thought maybe the splashing of a wave had brought some water onto the boat and he thought nothing more about it.   But the next day, there was more water on the boat.  He look around wondering if he had slept through a rain the night before, but took the only thing that he could find, a small cup and scooped out the water, throwing it back into the ocean. 

After a few days, the young man began to notice that the kitten was changing, looking a little different, but still just as adorable. He was occupied most days with catching enough fish to feed the kitten who was seeming to take on a huge appetite with each passing day.  This had left him little time to be attentive to navigating the boat because he spent most of his time constantly removing the water that was seeming to collect in the boat much faster than in the beginning. And the rest of the time he was only catching enough fish to feed the kitten, and some times was not always able to catch enough to feed himself.  This whole process was making him weak and weary.

One day, he looked at the kitten and realized that it had matured into a bobcat. He now understood the warnings that he had been given by his friends and family about taking the kitten along on the journey.  Even though it was clearly a bobcat, when he looked at it what he saw was the memories of what he thought was a cute and harmless kitten. But the nature of the cat had now changed and his interactions with it also had to change. And at the same time, the boat had taken on so much water that it was going to be near to impossible to get all of the water out of the boat. 

Faced with saving himself and the bobcat, the man contemplated what to do, knowing that he would have to decide soon because his life depended on it.   When he looked around to try to decide what his options were, he realized that with all of the time he had been out in the water that he had not navigated but had drifted a few miles from the shore.  Land and safety was still an option.

Having to decide about swimming in the waters and without having eaten much, knowing that his body was weak, he looked caringly  at the bobcat and wondered how would he save both himself and his kitten.  The bobcat was hungry. The boat was taking on water.  He was going to have to decide something.  He was already living with his mistakes, and now he really wanted to get it right. 

As he looked toward the shore, dread come over him. The dread was of coming back on shore, back to land and safety, but having to admit that he had made a mistake.  The thought of admitting his mistake became more important than saving his own life.   His pride was about to consume him.

All those who had warned him were watching from the shore. They had all wanted the best for him, but now they just wanted him to choose to save himself.  Even though he was to far away to hear them, they were all cheering for him, hoping that he would make it back to safety.  But as he look to the shore, the only thing he could think about was having to explain what had happened to him and why he was wrong.  It didnt occur to him that everyone who had warned him was doing so because they had the insight to warn him for a reason and that they cared enough to say something. Their words were not built from negativity, but from care and concern.  All of the warnings had been an attempt to show support and warn him for his own safety.  And this also meant, that they were not as surprised as he thought they would be about how things had turned out for him.

He hesitated. They watched. No one could make the choice for him.

Would the ship sink first or would the bobcat eat him before the ship sank, or would he choose to risk the swim toward shore, back to land, safety, and a welcomed return filled with too many questions?

HARD TO WATCH THE STUBBORN WILL

There are times when the most loving thing you can do is to take a hands off approach.  It is hard because the loving thing to do seems to be to support and guide and cheer.  But when a person has a stubborn and disobedient will, you cant do anything but allow them to learn the hard way.

Being that our culture is no longer as accountable as during biblical times, many people now do not understand nor respect the concept of having a sense of accountability to your community, especially the community of faith. For example during biblical times when something was considered a sin as unto death, this meant that you could actually be literally stoned to death. The offense was not only about the sin of the individual, but a reflection on the community as a whole, and therefore the community was within its right to respond. Currently our culture has gone the complete other end of the spectrum,  which means that we turn a blind eye to the wrong of others. Although I do think stoning is extremely harsh, I do believe that there is a place and purpose for a community, especially a community of faith, holding its members accountable for certain principles and behaviors. ( Here I must insert a note: I dont believe that 'putting people out of the church' is the correct response. As a matter of fact, I think that is just as harsh as stoning.)

Taking a hands off approach can look a lot of different ways, depending on the situation. This is very hard to do when you know that the person knows better and should be doing better. But the 'master of deception' does a good job at convincing the mind of the individual that there are other solutions other than doing things God's way, according to Biblical Principles.  That is exactly the success story of deception from the very beginning, to convince one that there are ways to get better outcomes than to be obedient to God's Principles.

The question might be asked, why would you want to negotiate with God? Why would you want anything thing other than God's Will for you?  And what do you really gain when you 'seemingly' win the negotiation with God?  Does getting your way instead of God's Will really turn out to be a win-win in the long run.... now or eternally?

The ripple effect of disobedience only leads to more and more disobedience, as one attempts to find ways to navigate making the disobedience seem like it is going to turn out alright. And before long there is a snowball affect of multiple acts of disobedience. And the disobedience leads to a house of mirrors of deception, eventually make the truth sound harsh and unreal.  As long as the individual is trying to sort out ways to make the wrong turn into a success, you cant reason with them about their thoughts or actions.

Here is where loving is hard. Letting go. Backing off.  This is also when you stop praying for God to cushion the blows that sin and disobedience are causing the person. This is when you realize that God is allowing the individual to truly see what getting their way means.   God is not going to be manipulated.  But God will let one have their way, and all that comes with it.  Being determined to be out of the Will of God, means being determined to deal with not having God's Covering or Guidance, as if saying to God that one wants God to take a Hands Off approach to one's life.

Think about it, if someone wants God to take a 'hands off' approach, then why would the same individual want someone to have a 'hands on' approach other than to support the deception? Being a support to others, often times means that you have to back away and God can allow the person to see where their way is taking their life. After all you cant become party to the wrong, or you too will find yourself slipping into darkness, and deception. 

Because here is the deal, deception loves darkness, hidden agenda, under the table negotiations and secrets.  One of the greatest clues that something is not according to God's Will is if it has to be kept secret or hidden.  I dont mean privacy, privacy is the right to keep things to yourself or away from the public.  But shame and guilt are built around those things that would not be justified as having a right motive from the start.

So why back off, other than self preservation?  I will give you an example of when my son was a toddler.  I kept saying to him hold on, dont fall down the steps.  I was doing what I thought was the loving thing to do by coddling his every move.  But one day a friend said to me, that he is a boy and he learns by understanding, and he wont understand until he sees for himself.  This was the most profound thing that was said to me about raising a son.

One day, I got up the courage to let him figure it out for himself. I was cautious to make sure that his fall was a little one and not a major one, but I had to let him navigate a few lower steps on his own, his way, without holding on.  And as truth would be revealed to him, he flopped down a couple of steps and then looked at me as if to say what happened.  The hundreds of times that I had attempted to get this message across to him, now he figured it out because he realized that he didnt like his own outcome.

This examples may seem simplistic, but from that day on, I never had to negotiate or even mention to my son that he needed to hold on while walking down the steps. Grabbing the railing became unspoken second nature.  And so it can be with someone who wants to try their hand at being blatantly and boldly disobedient to God's Principles.  The only thing you can do after attempting to coach and encourage is allow the individual to learn the hard way.  Some times the fall, the hitting bottom is what it will take to help the person know that they dont want to do it that way again.

This is when repentance is true.  True repentance is when one is no longer trying to make the disobedience work, but is willing to drop all wrong and turn with intention to do what is right with a no looking back mindset. It is the determination to be redeemed.  This is when the individual can stand before God with a sincere heart and say 'Lord, please take me back'.

Now the mindset has completely changed from negotiation with God to complete surrender to God.  Until the individual is willing to surrender, there will be a constant attempt to negotiate for good outcomes from disobedient actions and motives.  But once the individual surrenders and truly acknowledges their need for the Savior, then God can guide and send others to guide and support the individual getting back in step with the Will of God both spiritually and naturally.

Insomnia

It is 1:30am and I cant sleep.

I have so many thought in my mind right now.  I spend so much of my prayer life interceding for the needs of others that I often forget to really spend time praying about the things that I need in my own life.

And this is why being awake right now is so frustrating to me. Usually when I wake up in the middle of the night, I pray for the people and the situations that have been on my mind during the day or that come to my mind when I wake up. But when I woke up this time, my mind was flooded with thoughts of things that I need in my own life.

In the clinical world of providing services to others, there is an emphasis on self care. It is the understanding that you cant give to others if you not keeping yourself in a good place mentally, emotionally and spiritually.  The most basic example of this would be to think about the speech that they give you on the airplane about what to do in case of emergency. The instructions are to give yourself oxogen first, then share the oxogen with those around you. In this way, you are more capable when you have what you need.

And this would be the sum total of why I am awake in the middle of the night. I am being forced to face the truth of my own life. I have spent the last few years frustrated with myself because I know that I am not reaching my fullest potential, nor am I achieving at the rate that I should have been. And like a perfect storm of reality checks, it is clear to me that I am not getting what I need to flourish. I have just been existing and trying to function as if it has been sufficient and it has not been and the state of my life is proof of that fact.

So now, I am awake creating an order of importance for the things that I need to do for my self, for my own life. There are some voids in my own life that I need to give some attention to so that I can be nourished  and therefore function at a higher level of efficiency.  It is not being selfish in a way that doesnt care for others, but it is being selfish in a way that will help me to care for others better.

Spirituality and Sexuality - Part 1

For some days now I have been thinking about writing on the topic of love, but instead I am going to try to tackle a much more intense topic that is rarely discussed from a Christian spiritual frame of thinking.   It will probably take more than one post to really begin to unpack this topic, because there are a lot of variables that can play out, both naturally and spiritually.

Sex is not often talked about by Christians as a positive. Most of the time when it is discussed in church, it is from the list of dont do.  So even when Christians get married, they enter into marriage not knowing much about how sacred the sexual act of intercourse really is for both of them.

There needs to be more clarity given to the difference in the sacred act of intercourse in marriage and the physical sport of casual sexual behavior that is so common in our culture today.  The bible is constantly talking about the flesh in the New Testament. This is for a very good reason.

You need your senses to be aware of the natural world around you as well as to be aware of the spiritual world around you.  If you allow your senses to control you, then you will become desensitized to what is going on around you, both naturally and spiritually.  You have to be the controller of your flesh, you can not allow your flesh to control you.

In the context of a monogamous marriage, the senses are strengthened and not depleted. This is because the man and the woman are sharing a sacred sexual experience. They are becoming unified and this level of unity manifest in every aspect of their lives as individuals and as a couple.  This is why you will hear married people begin to use the same vocabulary and phrases, and even begin to communicate much more non verbally, as they become in tune with each other.

Pastors can look at the couples in their congregation and see which couples are truly unified and which couples are trying to pretend to be unified.  When a couple is not equally yoked it is obvious, it shows in many ways, but most importantly it shows in what they are able to accomplish in their walk with Christ, and in their individual callings.

Sexual intercourse is not only the sharing of the physical body, but it is also the sharing of that person's spiritual self.  So the person who has multiple sexual partners is becoming sexually schizophrenic. When you share your essence with someone, you are basically giving and receiving. You are giving away some of who you are spiritually and receiving some of who that person is spiritually.   So when you are sexual with a person who does not view their own body as sacred and spiritually connected to God, then you are devaluing your own body and spirit.

In church, the message is to avoid being 'unequally yoked',  or a more modern way to say it to say dont be tied to someone who is not a spiritual match.  The yoke is an apparatus that is used to tie two working animals together so that the strength of them both can be used to increase the productivity by powering the load to be pulled by the strength of the unified effort.   If one is too much stronger than the other, the stronger one will tire too quickly from taking too much of the labor load, and will eventually be dragging not only the weight of the load, but of the other animal too.  This will not only make the progress take longer, but will eventually bring the work to a complete stop, much sooner than if the two animals are more equal in strength.

Take that and apply it to a marriage, and you can have two people who are on the same path and level of awareness spiritually and they can accomplish much more, and much faster than they could as individuals working solo.  But if one of the people in the marriage is spending all of their prayer life and the spiritual awareness trying to drag someone along the path to spiritual growth, they risk becoming tired and unable to accomplish very much for the Kingdom because their spouse is lagging behind and as a team, they cant go any faster or any farther than the weaker, slower person is able or willing.

In seminary, one of the counseling classes that I had to take was Spirituality and Sexuality.  This class was a lot of information about the functions of the body and how to minister to people who were dealing with various sexual issues and concerns.  But when the instructors started talking about how you must understand that you are who you share your body with because you are sharing spiritually because sex is a spiritual act, I realized that in my upbringing this had not been discussed, but on some level it made total sense.

This is why those who are the most depleted as individuals are those who have given themselves away freely, and who are also the most empty spiritually and emotionally.  The constant search for what can only be found in God is what the they are actually trying to find in another empty person.  And two empty people can only share their emptiness.  And the more empty the individual feels, the more they seek after someone to make them feel better, to feel full. It becomes a sad and dangerous cycle.

For a person to value your body, they must value their own.  The person must see their sexuality as a sacred expression, not to be shared with just anyone and not to be shared with someone who is not on the same spiritual path.  If a person shares their body with some who is spiritually schizophrenic, then the individual is welcoming all of those spirits that the other person has into their being as well.  When this happens, all the spirits become familiar. When the spirits all become familiar, then the senses dont become alarmed and are no longer alert to the danger.  As a matter of fact, because the spirits seem familiar, they will also seem to be safe.  In other words, the spiritual attack is not an aggressive or violent one, but a gentle sensual one.

The bible lets us know that the marriage bed is undefiled, because the expectation is of respect for the body as sacred, and respect for the sexual experience of the marriage to be free from the residue of other people's spiritual residue.  Therefore sacred sexuality is in the context of a monogamous marriage between spiritual equals. Even if they are not equals, they become equally what each person brings into the covenant bond. In this way , the marriage changes both the man and the woman into the version of self that is enmeshed with what they share with their spouse.

Success is Relative

Success is relative. Each person has their own idea of success and each person has their own measure for where one is in the journey to accomplishment.  One of the biggest mistakes that anyone can make is to measure one's own level of accomplishment by someone else's accomplishments in a different area or field.

Most of the time when envy and jealous occur it is because of comparing apples to oranges, not comparing the same skills and the same types of success to each other. One thing that I have noticed is that people who are striving for their own excellence dont really have the mental energy for such comparisons anyway.  The most critical opinions come from the most stagnant people. And when I say stagnant, I dont mean this to imply that the person or persons have not accomplished, but that they realize their own limitations and have some sort of regret because of how their own life choices created those limitations.

The choices that a person makes can totally shift the events of the rest of one's life.  The truth is that we can not see into the future and at the time that we make the decision, we feel it is the best decision or the right decision based on the current information that we have at the time.  And in most cases, there are ways to adjust or modify the decision, but some times the decisions that we make just have to walk out and live with, accepting what it brings with it.

A spirit filled Christian should always be prayerful about major decisions. In this, one must be willing to be obedient to what the Holy Spirit is guiding one to do. When it comes to living out one's calling, this really cant be determined by anyone else.  We live in a world that says that you must get the approval of others, but in truth, people may not always understand or agree with your calling.  This can be challenging for the person who needs the affirmation of others to feel comfortable taking certain steps in life.  It is normal for each of us to want to be loved and accepted, but we may not always get this from the people that we look to provide it for us.

Finding the love and support that one needs to nourish one's human need for affirmation and a sense of community can be challenging for us all, and especially for those who dont fit in with mediocrity.  So may people who have gifts and callings to go farther and higher in areas of success dont do so because of the need for a sense of community, and the fear of being isolated in the process of reaching for more within the context of one's goals.

The truth is that one can not truly flourish and reach the fullest potential of one's own goals until one is really ready to let go of the atmosphere of mediocrity.  Getting uncomfortable is what pushes one forward, gives one the determination to proceed regardless of the opinions of those who are comfortable in mediocrity.  Along the way, one begins to meet others who are on similar journeys, and this provides a more natural and organic sense of community, a community of people who can understand and affirm the journey.

Let's be honest, everyone is not built for the same types of success. And some dont have the drive to go out into the unknown with the courage that it takes to face what others cant imagine.   Most of the time, the people who discourage others from working toward their vision do so because it is not their vision.  You cant expect people to understand what they cant see or imagine.  Anyone who does not understand the vision will have a hard time being a part of your journey towards accomplishing it.

It is my prayer that the God given vision will take you into the fullness of following the calling and the gifts that God has place in this time and space for a reason. I pray that God surround you with people who understand what it is like to step out of the routine and reach for all that God has for you. True happiness is living affirmed in what God created you to do and to be.

I Haven't Ask God For Enough

This evening I had a conversation with a friend who is a single parent like myself, and we were talking about the challenges of even meeting a potential companion. We are both single parents and our lives are built around the activities of church and our children.  We attend a large church, that is probably about 85% or more married couples, and most of the singles are females.

In our conversation we both agreed we didnt have any brilliant ideas about where to add meeting new people to our lives. I mentioned some of the possible activities that we might explore to meet new people in general, activities that would be co-ed and not just full of more single women. We tossed around a few thoughts, but didnt come up with anything that would be an Aha! moment.   So we left the conversation with continue on as usual as the stopping point of our discussion.

I went home thinking about all that I needed to do to settle in for the evening and to get ready for tomorrow. As I reflected on our conversation, in my mind, I went through what was wrong with the last person that I attempted to consider allowing into my life. I thought about all of the disappointment and the betrayal that was the package that this person brought with him. I had tossed and tossed in my mind about what was the problem, because after all he was saved. So a saved man would be trustworthy and dependable and full of integrity - or so I thought.

This is when it dawned on me. This was when I had the AHA! moment. I had been making an amateur's mistake in my prayer for a life companion. When I went down through all of the thoughts in my mind about what I didnt want to have to deal with at this phase in my life, it occurred to me that I was making the assumption that someone considering himself a Christian, meant that he was the whole package. I was absolutely wrong!  This actually only meant that he had completed step one, in a life long, three step process.
What I was not asking for in my prayers was someone who was more than saved. No, I am not taking about his material gain, or his education level, or even what was in his past.  But what I was missing was something extremely essential to his present state of being in his walk with Jesus Christ = Sanctification and being filled with the Holy Ghost.  I have been around the church world of Pentecostals most of my life and these three works of Grace are considered essential for maintenance of a Christian Life of Holiness. I had forgotten, that everyone who considers to be Christian is not trying to become more like Christ. Some people are willing to take the just enough approach to having a relationship with Jesus Christ. I dont want someone in my life who is taking the minimalist approach to Christ.

It takes wanting to go to another level in relationship with Christ, to live Godly and walk away from the sinful nature, giving up the things in life that are contrary to a life of holiness. I am not claiming to be perfect, so I dont expect my future companion to be perfect, that would be unrealistic and self deception.  But do want someone who is working on being a better man, and who in his heart, truly wants to live a life that is pleasing to God.  For that to happen, he will have to want more of God, more of God's Holy Spirit. The person has to have a hunger for the things of God. The person has to realize that everything else that he has tried has not cured the uneasiness in their being.  It is when the person has come to the conclusion that there has to be a better way, and be willing to give up everything that hasnt worked, for what God has to offer. He will have to have already come to the conclusion that what he is thirsty for can not be found in a sinful lifestyle, but only in the 'wells of salvation' where there is joy and peace beyond compare to anything that sin has to offer. He has to have a thirst for what is right. He has to want to be right with God.  This is the place of no longer wanting to struggle to maintain a life of sin, a life that goes against God plan for LIFE.

All of the things that I dont want to deal with in a relationship, and especially in a future companion wont be a problem with a man who wanting to go in the same direction that I am going, and who has no interest in going backwards spiritually.  So I now realize that I have been very minimal in my prayer. I don't just want someone in my life who is saved. I want a man in my life who is SAVED, SANCTIFIED, and FILLED  with the HOLY GHOST.  I want the whole package. I want God's best for my life.

STRONGHOLDS

I have had a lot on my mind the past few days. And for some reason, I went to bed last night thinking about the buoyancy of a duck.  This lead me to wonder if a duck could actually drown.  So I went to Google and Youtube to find out.  It turns out that a duck can actually drown. Furthermore, other ducks can and do intentionally drown fellow ducks.  

Now in my head, I had decided that ducks would not be able to drown because they are full of oil.  If you have ever eaten duck, which I do highly recommend, by the way, if not prepared well it is greasy because the flesh of the duck holds a lot of oil.   So in my mind, the duck was so full of anointing, if you will allow me,  it would not sink.  All though it sounds great, it is not accurate. 

What actually keeps the duck afloat is a combination of a waxy coating on its feathers and air pockets that give ducks the ability to float.  Ducks are not heavy birds, so they do have some advantages to this in their ability to float and swim. 

This made me think about how often we take for granted what we think is holding us up in life. Most of us could do more in focusing on what we have on our outer layers that are keeping us afloat.  Way to often, we let things outside of one's self have control and influence over our actions and motives.  This is why recognizing strongholds is so important for the Christian.  

Anything that has more power over you or influence on your behavior than the Holy Spirit and Word of God can become or already is a stronghold. It is important to put on the Whole Armor of God.  This is the protective barrier that keeps outside forces from having control in one's life.  Most of the time, the things that control the individual, whether it be addiction, or immoral behavior,  is rooted in in unhealed hurts. It is rooted in a thirst for the healing that can only come from the Power of God being active in one's life.  It requires surrender, not sort of or partially, but complete surrender. It requires wanting to be nourished by God and find healing to the point that nothing else matters as much.  In this sense of crisis and urgency, one finds the desire to become sanctified, cleansed from things that are not right in the Eyes of God. 

 You can not take control over what has a hold on you. You can not take authority over what has authority over you. One can not take authority over what one feels sorry for - this will only cause you to make excuses for it.  And one can not take authority over something that has the ability tempt one with an offer- this will cause you to be in fellowship with it. If you try to take authority over what has authority over you, at the same time that what has authority over you is trying to maintain authority over you, then you are wrestling with that stronghold. 

(Ephesians 6:10-20).

 As long as living sinfully appears to have more to offer than living for Christ, the individual is not at a place of surrender.  That means that the stronghold is still actively controlling the motives and behaviors. We can overcome those things that want to hold us back from our godly potential.  We have to be intentional to shut down access to our lives of anyone and anything that brings distance to our relationship with God.  We must not allow strongholds to have access to our mentality and our desires. 

This past week, I read a good bit of Entire Devotion to God by Phoebe Palmer and one of the things that I noticed was her sense of urgency toward sanctification and holiness.  This sense of urgency was once a major theme in holiness churches, but in recent years has taken a back seat to other more popular topics. But Palmer makes the point that we are not guaranteed to have more time to fix or repair the damage that we are doing to our eternal potential, nor should we become too relaxed about taking control over the sin in our lives. 

Strongholds rob us of our potential in the Kingdom of God. They drown us in misguided priorities. Physically, Mentally, and literally, we have to respond well spiritually so that the natural manifestation in one's life reflects the determination to live according to God's Word.  We have the authority of God's Word as grounds for changing our attitude and mindset, so that we can walk away from sinful behaviors and become intentional about raising our own standards.  Strongholds reflect lowered standards. Living according to God's Word reflects higher standards. Through the Power of Jesus Christ, we have the ability to overcome challenges and weakness in our lives and to be healed and made whole. 

• We dont have to sink in sin. 
• We dont have to die in our sins. 
• We can be free. 
• We can be made whole. 
• We can be saved. 
• We can be healed. 
• We can be delivered. 
• We can be filled with the Power of the Holy Ghost. 

Temptation

Today, was a good day.  I went to church, as I regularly do, but today was different for several reasons. I have had a lot on my mind and I have been questioning some of the ways that I have handled some choices in my personal life.  

As most of us do at some point and time,  I was thinking about how differently my outcomes could have been if I had made some different choices, both career and personal.   So when I say that I went to church today, that was really loaded with a lot of alternatives that were going through my head---specifically the thought of spending the day on the beach.  But I decided to stay the course and go to church. 

I love my church.  Being a part of a community of believers is very important to me.  What makes this important is the shared understanding of what Phil Robertson- the patriarch of the Duck Dynasty family- calls "Biblical Correctness".   Biblical principles are the foundation to my views and to be in a church that goes to the Bible to articulate why certain topic should be discussed a certain way or managed a certain way is important. 

Today we had a guest speaker. I have never heard him before, and didnt know anything about him other than I know that there are some specific criteria about the type of speaker that will be invited to speak at my church. And this man did not disappoint.  The topic of his sermon was "Our Conviction". He gave several examples of why we have our convictions and what the world system is set in place to do regarding pulling us way from what we believe about God and our walk as believers and followers of Christ. 

So, as I reflect on several things, I realize that what causes us to be challenged in our convictions is temptation.  It comes in many forms and in many ways. It is not always the obvious right or wrong, but temptation most of the time looks like the better option. It looks like the easier option and it markets a better outcome.  

Temptation  has the job of trying to convince you that you can outsmart the plan of God.   In this way, making wrong look right is the ultimate goal.   And it is impossible to hold on to both wrong and right at the same time. So temptation is what forces you to feel like you have to choose, it becomes an either/or dynamic. This is when you begin to feel the urge that a choice must be made quickly, before you miss the opportunity and before you talk your self into something else.   Anything that requires you to rush, might be something to take notice of whether it is leading you in the right way or the wrong way. Ask yourself, what is the urgency?  If the urgency is not related to pleasing God or obeying God's Word, then more than likely it is temptation trying to pull you away from what is right. 

Since it is temptation's job to look like, not only a good idea, but the best idea, this means that many times scripture or doing right will seem to be the outcome.  For example, Sarah had already been given a promise from God. One that she laughed at because it seemed impossible.  It was not that she didn't want what God had promised, but in her trying to rationalize how it could be, she decided to help the process along. She decided to act without instruction from God.   If God could send the messengers to tell her and her husband what God was going to do, then obviously if God had instructions for them those would have been given. But without instructions Sarah figured she would figure it out herself.  

Temptation would have to believe that God needs you to figure out how to make what God has already said come to reality. This is not true. God is fully aware of the details needed for what God has planned for your life. God has all of the details under control. 

Due Season

There is a moment in time when what seems impossible or beyond your ability suddenly looks different to you. Not because the situation has changed in the natural, but because your perspective has changed spiritually. It is when you realize that God is much more calculating than the challengers and much more limber than the obstacles. It is when you begin to see the unimaginable starting to manifest before it has actually happened completely. It is when your perspective changes from 'I don't see how'...... to 'there is NOTHING too hard for GOD'.  In that moment, you realize that God is about to give you a miracle. God is about to do something that a human could not do or take the credit for when it happens.   When it is a true miracle, no one can be given the credit for the accomplishment but God. 

One of the most amazing things that can happen is to watch God bring about a shift in a situation in your life.  There are times when you can't  see or imagine how to get from one manifestation to another, but God is so much better at the details than we could ever be, and God works in and through things that we have not even thought could be resolved. It is the awesome ability of God to orchestrate and demonstrate POWER.

Many times we think of due as a moment, but it is a time, a season. When the season shifts we must be ready.  We must be tuned into the Will of God, and to the Holy Spirit, so that we can properly respond to the shifting of the seasons.

Due Season is a shift that is not able to be calculated exactly, but when it comes, we have to be ready to change our mindset, because our function and mentality have to shift with the season. It is similar to harvest for the farmer. It does not happen in one day, but in one day you can realize that it is time to shift. The shift is when you begin to see things as ready for another phase than before.

Due Season is when you have to begin to work differently because the task and goal is different. It requires a completely different mode of operation, one that you have to be prepared for, or you will not shift efficiently in what must be done.

For example, the farmer who has prepared the ground, and planted and watered, and pulled weeds and kept an eye on the field, will begin to notice the changes that occur as the field begins to sprout and then to grow. As it grows, the farmer can begin to anticipate and even calculate when it will be time to harvest what has been planted. But there will come a day when the farmer realizes that it is time to shift, from nurturing the crops to harvesting the crops. It would look like he is destroying his own work, but in truth he has shifted to another season.  Every thing about his mechanism must change because it is a new season. One that requires the readiness to do something with the harvest. Not only does the harvest have to happen within a window of time, but also what is going to be done with the newly harvested crop must also happen in this season, or else the work will only produce a portion of its full potential. The crop as it is harvested has to be managed to prepare for use and for storage. If the crop is not stored properly it will not be able to keep for a long period of time and much of it will become useless and spoiled. Therefore, the crop must be gathered and stored in a way that gives it potential not just for the due season, but for the seasons that are to come that will not produce anything new. It is God's way of preparing us for a time when nothing is coming due, but so that we will have no lack or need.

This is why it is so important to understand the value of the Due Season. The excitement of knowing God is providing must be met with wisdom to understand that it is God maturing some things in our lives that God has been preparing and making ready. When all the details are just as God wants, then the season shifts and the value of what we have been looking at one way suddenly turns as we see things coming not only to natural maturity, but spiritual maturity.

Due Season is the day that you realize that the shift is actually happening, that God has actually done more than you could have imaged possible. It is like the crop planted in the ground, the dirt is covering its progress, just like the situations in our lives cover our own progress. But as the plant grows and sprouts above ground, it is easier to see the progress. We have to know that God is working even when we don't see the progress. This is our faith in what God has promised.

When we begin to see the things sprouting, we can get excited because of its potential, but when God brings it into full maturity, it will be beyond what we could have ever imagined, because it is not only to help us survive, but it is also to nourish us -- both spiritually and naturally.  It is also to help us walk in the fulfillment of our purpose and calling.

Due Season is not just to relieve the needs and lacking places in our lives, but it is to give us the strength and nourishment to walk in our calling and give us the fortitude and tenacity to walk in every gift that God has placed within us.

God's provision is amazing. God's provision contains so many details that we could have never even imagined. And in the timing of God, when every detail that seemed to be separate and unconnected  suddenly makes sense, that is God showing us that it is time to prepare for a new season in our life. When God's Promise suddenly seems tangible, that is God telling us to get prepared for the harvest that we will have when the season has shifted. It cant be rushed, but we also have to be ready.

We have to have our mind prepared to let go of the old season and the work that we did in that past season and look forward to the things that will take us forward in God and the abundance of what God has been preparing to place before us in Due Season.


John 10:10
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come so that they may have life, and may have it abundantly. 

Why Be A Christian?

What really separates Christians from the rest of the world? This is the question I have been asking myself lately. Not because I dont  already have my own ideas about the subject, but because I am curious to know what the mental status is of the masses.

For me, being a Christian, has everything to do with understanding and replicating, in my own life the ideology, theology, and compassion of Christ. After all, Christ was concerned with those in the community. People were drawn to Jesus Christ because he had something to say, but also because his actions had a huge and wonderful impact on those around him.  If we are to call ourselves Christians, followers of the life and teachings of Christ, then it should stand to reason that our lives should show some effectiveness in impacting the lives of others in a positive way.

Docile should not ever be the mode of operation for a Christian, who is attempting to live a life motivated by sharing the Good News of Jesus Christ. This does not mean that Christians should be constant warriors, nor does it mean that Christians should be absolutely passive. But what it does mean that we should navigate the impact that our life has on those around us in such a way that we reflect what it is that we say we believe.

Lately I have found myself amazed at how many people who are good church attending Christians, but have no sensibility towards anything outside of their church and home. How can you effectively share the love of Christ when your only concern is for people who are already stepping inside the doors of the church?  Dont get me wrong, there are definitely some people attending church who are not necessarily followers of the teachings of Christ. So yes, there are lives to be impacted from inside the church, but there are masses of people who are walking this earth hurting, lonely and feeling disconnected from God, who could use some insight into how the Good News includes them.

Church as a community of believers is important to strengthening each other, both naturally and spiritually, as we all attempt to navigate this life, but we are also held accountable to the need for those who are not connected by a relationship with Jesus Christ. But in so many ways, church has become just the alternative to the club, where people show up for the ambiance, the music, networking, or just to be seen. Attending church should not have the same agenda as going out to the club. And wearing more conservative clothes does not mean the the agenda of your heart is right.

Church attendance should not be about proving to anyone that you are just as much of a Christian because you are always there. Church attendance should be about a desire to learn more about God through the fellowship and study of the Word of God in the presence of like-minded followers of the teachings of Jesus Christ. Hearing the preached Word is important because it should draw you in to realizing that God is waiting to receive you into a relationship with all that the Kingdom of God has to offer you both in this life, and in the afterlife.

 As Christians, our own relationship with Christ, has limited growth potential until we become active agents of Christ' love and concern for others, and not just the people that we like or the people that we think are worthy. If receiving the love of Christ was based on who was worthy, then none of us would be eligible. In fact, it is realizing how unworthy we are that leaves us in awe of God's willingness to love and provide for us.

Anyone who thinks being loved is based on meeting a certain set of criteria, has missed the entire point of receiving love.  None of us have received loved because we were deserving of it, we received love because of the heart of the giver of that love and the desire to share it.  It is a matter of desire that compels us to want to share the love of Christ with others. Once we truly understand the depth of God's love for us, we cant help but want to share this great love with others.

I am thankful to God that Love was not given to me based on what I deserved, but based on what I needed, even when I didnt know that it was love that I needed. God has blessed each of us with the opportunity to show the Love of Jesus Christ. It is time to stop holding on to what was meant to be shared --- for it is in the spirit of sharing this Love that we find deeper understanding of our own relationship to the Ultimate Giver - God.

Rainbow to 2012

First off, let me admit that I am up way to late! Yes I should have been sleep hours ago. But instead I am up surfing through Blogger looking at the different ways that people have designed their page to add a flavor of uniqueness to their page.  It would seem that every idea that I have come across would require my revisiting my html code skills.

I took a class in undergrad in computer programming, but it was not my strong suit at all. Back then, computer screens were dark, off black, and the letters were a horrible shade of green. That was it. That was as far as the technology had reached when I was learning computer programming. And I had absolutely no plans of perfecting this skill because I didnt see where it was going to be very entertaining to my imagination. If only I had know how far the technology would advance.

As I sat thinking about the concept of a 'Rainbow Tea'.... and pondered what spiritual insight could be gain from this form of fellowship, I began to think about where it could be found in the bible. What I did come across was the memory of the most popular childhood bible story about Noah and the Ark.  There was a rainbow in the bible.

The Noahic Covenant is the promise that God is not going to destroy everything on earth by a flood of water. We do still have some flooding, but not the entire earth. It is absolutely amazing to me, when I think about the fact that the pressure of the water in the ocean is holding the water back from the land. That is not a very scientific explanation, and sorry that I cant communicate it any better than that. But let me say it this way, the deeper you go into the ocean there is more pressure, that pressure is pulling things to the bottom. The items that actually make it so deep into the ocean will eventually shrink from the pressure. If that pressure were not holding the layers of the ocean in place the land would be covered with water.

Ok, so fast forward beyond basic Sunday School lessons of Noah and the Flood, and my sad regurgitation of Earth Science to the apocalyptic mis-interpretation of the Mayan Calendar.

First let me make clear my personal theology is always grounded in the biblical text. But I am always looking to understand other reading based on how I understand the bible. This means that I am open to reading various writings, but look for how those writings  agree with or contradict the bible.

Secondly, the Mayan calendar is interesting for several reasons related to science, agriculture, and humanity on many levels. The best way to simplify it would be to say this is the Meso-American version of a Farmer's Almanac. I really dont know enough about the mythology that accompanies this series of works to speak well on the subject. There is a lot going on in the way they figured out their system. It includes the human gestation period of 40 weeks, and various other elements that create this understanding of the world and how it cycles.

I have always been fascinated with Teotihuacan and hope to actually go there and see the Temple of Quetzalcoatl. After all building a structure that when the sun is moving through the sky makes shadow that appears to be that of a moving 'feathered serpent'. I mean, seriously, who thought up that architectural design?  When you look at it, it just looks like a large staircase. We are not talking about a small building here, we are talking about a place where almost 100,00 people could live inside the walls around this compound. Anyway, the connection some make with cosmological myths is how you get to the apocalyptic connection. The logic being from 'beginning to end' for some might be more about quantum physics than actually anything related to theology.

The point that I am making here, is that the story of Noah and the Ark is much easier to rationalize and explain than the details of the Mayan mythology. You cant be a surface reader or thinker and even begin to explore the this Mayan concept of 2012. It frustrates me to hear people talking about it as if they have read it, but they are not very knowledgeable about Meso-American culture or any of the various 'pyramids' around the world.

What I can say is that from the 'almanac' stance, the earth is shifting itself. So many natural events are taking place in the last few years, I mean a series of storms producing tornadoes that ravaged a large chunk of the U.S. this past summer is just one of the things that comes to mind, and now there seems to be earthquakes happening in different locations...Reading Mark 13, these days gives some perspective to those of us who look to the biblical text for insight and understanding. . I dont think the world is coming to an end in 2012, the truth is that I cant call it, but I think the Earth is getting prepared for something........... only GOD knows.

"It's Gonna Rain" Andrae Crouch

Should Christians Be Entrepreneurs?

For those of you who know me, this may truly seem to be a rhetorical question, but bear with me as I work through this thought.

Just as an entrepreneur, to be legitimate, must have the proper credentials to work in a geographic region or state, so does any corporation that would hire someone to do the exact same job as an employee of that particular company. In the corporate setting the individual may or may not need to have a license to perform that job. There are many aspects to being an entrepreneur that differ from being a corporate employee, more than I actually care to go into at this time. But it is safe to say that 'it cost to be the boss'. To be an entrepreneur, you have to be willing to invest in your own success or failure.

Now that being said, there are all kinds of people who are capable of performing a specific task or job, who lacks proper training or licensure (what some would call 'boot-leg'). But to truly be defined as an entrepreneur some steps had to be taken to operate or function as a business. For example, as a licensed cosmetologist, I have a license from the state that lets anyone know that I have completed to proper training and met the requirements to have my name on that license. With that license, I have the choice to set up shop for myself or to find a place to work for a business that will allow me to function within the boundaries of my licensure.

As I pondered my heartfelt theological stance on a statement that a friend made, I had to formulate what my stance was on this ideology. Not just as one applicable to business practices, but also as it applies to ministry. It began with hearing someone, who is an entrepreneur repeat what her pastor says regarding those who decide to found or pastor a non-denominational church.  The person I was speaking with made the statement, 'a non-denominational church means they dont want to obey leadership'.

My first instinct was to defend the misconception that all non-denominational churches are not in fellowship with other like-minded ministries/organizations and therefore accountable to that organizations structure. I do realize that most people have been lead to believe that non-denominational churches are all part of some pseudo-christian gypsy like cult.  But the truth is that leaders and churches, do at times, liberate themselves from mainstream denominational obligations for a number of reasons. This does not mean that their ministry is illegitimate or demonic. 

Are there cults out there? Yes.  Are there churches who severed ties with their denomination because they had issues with a  or some of the leaders? Yes.  And there are those who for what ever reason decided that their ministry would function with some level of autonomy, free from the propaganda of denominational politics. All in all, there are many reasons that a church may not be part of denominational affiliation.

Let me be clear, I am not supporting any Jim Jones type situation, but I am saying that there must be some liberty in God. For example, when I was a little girl, I heard a lot of talk about how no one other than those of certain denominations or christian lifestyles would be going to heaven. This kind of talk is hardly ever spoken with the fervor that I recall from back a few decades ago. This seems to have transitioned from an 'if you are aren't with us, your going to hell' mentality to an 'if you arent with some brand name denomination then you must be a treasonous defector of the faith'.  Pastors and churches run the gamut, everything from great to horrible can be found in the mix, but even that is relative to the needs of the people who attend that congregation. We should all be concerned when church becomes the mechanism to destroy people's lives and families, but aside from moral and literal destruction, we should hope and pray that a Christian church will teach true Christian principles regardless of denominational affiliation.

This makes me wonder if Christians are ready to, and truly able to, develop a justification for any type of entrepreneurship. After all, if anyone who is not submitting to the leadership of another is in error, then what does that say to the business entrepreneur? Or is  the entrepreneurial spirit only applicable in business and not appropriate for ministry?  Why is the Church so adamantly opposed to any congregation or leader who is not a part of a mainstream denominational affiliation?

Should all Christians give up their entrepreneurial dreams and conform to the job description and identity given to one by a corporation? Should all Christian leaders only define their call to the ministry according to the perimeters establish with in the denominational structure?

How many people do you know who are working for a corporation, but not fully using their abilities because of the restrictions of the job or the organization? Is that the mindset that one should have about a church or denomination?  Isnt Christianity truly about Liberation from Oppression? Isnt Christianity about being free to walk and live in the fullness of one's God given identity with out being socially obligated to the political and religious legalism? Arent we all accountable to God? As Christians arent we optimistic and hopeful that we can learn to walk in the Liberty of Salvation? If a Christian church is non-denominational does that make the church or the congregants any lesser as believers and followers of Jesus Christ? Did Jesus always go along with the religious order of his day?

Tried in the Fire

As I was watching the nightly news on this week, I was frustrated to see a story about a small community in Tennessee. It was hours away from there area where I was born and raised, but yet it was in my home state. So I became a bit invested in the story before I even understood the extent to which the contents of the news story would frustrate me.

Home Burns, Firefighters Refuse to Respond


What immediately came to my mind was the greatest commandment (Matthew 22:36-40).  It saddens me to see what has become of our treatment of each other in this country. Everything boils down to the almighty dollar.  Being a capitalist country has almost completely alleviated the heart of so many Americans. 

This may sound like a harsh observation, but ask yourself this, 'how in the world could those trained and equipped to fight fires be so callus as to stand by knowing that a family's home is burning down and not do anything about it over $75 worth of fire protection?  I do understand the dynamics of the county budget and such, but this seems almost mafia in spirit.  With any law there is the spirit of the law and the letter of the law. And I would dare guess that this fee was set in place as a way to finance the service, but it has now become the same service that was denied to someone in need.

In this small town, I cant image what makes others in the community able to watch a friend and a neighbor's home burn to the ground based on some principle that is not grounded in Christian love. What happened to the days when we helped our neighbors build and maintain? There is this image in my mind of the neighbors coming with buckets and passing them to each other to reach the flames in a joint effort to put out the fire. There was a time when this seemed like just the right thing to do.  There is no mention of the people in the neighborhood standing up to the challenge to help put out the fire, even though the local firefighters wouldnt fight the fire.  So in my mind, the neighbors are just as much of a concern as the issue with the firefighters. Even if the firefighters refused to work to put out the fire over the $75 fee, why weren't the neighbors willing to pitch in form a plan of action and work to save the home?  Who wants neighbors that will stand by and let your home burn down without at least making some neighborly effort?

As a Christian nation, are we not disturbed to know that we treat each other this way? This family not only lost their home, but they lost family heirlooms and family history.  When do we begin to re-evaluate what it is that we say that we believe? When do we stand up for what is right?

Stand By Your Man - pt. 2

As the story unfolds in the media, I wonder if we are thinking with a heart of empathy. I say that because there are some concerns that I have about this woman who is standing by her man publicly.

Many of us would take the stance that it is not our business or that she knows what kind of man she has, but what about the part of the story that is not being told? What about the fact that the media is missing? Are we helpless to respond?

I bring these questions because there are many reasons why a woman stands by her man during scandal or even difficult times. Many times it is from years of being manipulated or abused (physically and/or psychologically). Many times it is because the woman thinks that it is the good Christian thing to do.....to silently pray for the situation and endure. Technorati Tags: Abuse, Emotions, Humanity, Marriage, EthicsWe dont know what Ms.Long has to deal with, but can be concerned that she may be silently crying out for help.

At first, I wondered how she could stand by her husband in the midst of the accusations. But when I saw the clip of the press conference, I thought of her standing by her man as a wife should. The more I thought about it, the more I thought about the pressure that must be on her to not betray this beloved leader in this time of crisis. I cant help but wonder if this has been the pressure that has caused her to turn her head in silence or to be so depressed herself that she was unable to be anything other than powerless to respond.

So many times, we see the public face and have no idea what a person is really living with in their own home. We have become so materialistic that we think of things in terms of monetary value, but many times we forget to investigate the real issues that are present with humanity.

The truth is that manipulative people manipulate. The wife would not be exempt from such manipulation. Abusers abuse and the wife would not be exempt from abuse. Even though it may have manifested in very different ways in the marriage, it is hard for me to believe that she is not a victim in some way. I may not be able to name it or to prove it, but she is hurting from this entire situation more than any of us will ever know.

Is she standing by her man because she loves him so much that she is determined to be there? Is she being forced or does she feel forced to stand by her husband for fear of creating enemies of church members who have their hearts fixed on believing that he is innocent? Is she just waiting for this to pass before she responds to this issue in their marriage? Is she another helpless victim of his behavior?

There are so many reasons why a woman stands by her man. Many of those reasons are honorable, but many of them are the result of psychological trauma, depression, fear....and the list can go on.

In the midst of it all, I would hope that there are those who are able to reach out to her and help her to find her way through this situation with a prayerful heart and the healing that will help her do what is best. After all, the marriage is a sacred covenant that is not be taken lightly, but every human being has a right to live in peace and safety. For whatever reason Ms. Long is standing by her man, I pray that she is able to find healing and restoration in her soul.

PASTOR WORSHIP

As I think back over the years to the scandals that I can remember, many of them involved prominent preachers.  This factor is due to the fact that I was raised in church and a lot of my family experience and social awareness had something to do with church.

One of the things that has always, and still does fascinate me is how people can go beyond respecting, beyond the admiring of gifts, beyond envy, beyond ‘star struck’ over into a completely other zone of literally worshipping the pastor.

In my opinion there is nothing wrong with acknowledging and respecting someone for their gifts, but when transforms into worship then it becomes problematic.

 

The first reason this is problematic is due to the humanity of the one being worshiped.  The act of worship is reserved for a deity. There is but one GOD, who is the creator and sustainer of us all. God actually spoke to this issue a long time ago, "Thou shalt have no other gods before me." (Exodus 20:3- for those of you who didn’t have the Sunday
School experience.)

Simple enough, right?  God tells us that God doesn’t want us to raise any one or anything us as a god in front of GOD. Since God is everywhere and at all times, that means not at all.

 

We see some of the pitfalls and disappointments that can come from a human being that is treated as a deity in
some of the situations that manifest out of it.  But how do we respect and care for those who are gifted by God without using them as a surrogate?

We as human beings have a responsibility to uphold our end the the individual relationship to God. This would include recognizing the difference in a mortal and God.

Public figures and high profile personalities are still humans. So when we have to look for a source of the
grandiosity the builds up in an person to make them feel that they are above the law or above moral standards, then we have to look ourselves. As we look at ourselves we must ask, ‘have I more respect of this person than I do for the
Almighty God’?

“Therefore you are inexcusable, O man, whoever you are that judge: for wherein you judge another, you condemn yourself; for you that judge do the same things. But we are sure that the judgment of God is according to truth against them which commit such things. And think you this, O man, that judge them which do such things, and do the same, that you shall escape the judgment of God? Or despise you the riches of his goodness and forbearance and long-suffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leads you to repentance? But after your hardness and impenitent heart
treasure up to yourself wrath against the day of wrath and revelation of the righteous judgment of God; Who will render to every man according to his deeds: To them who by patient continuance in well doing seek for glory and honor and immortality, eternal life: But to them that are contentious, and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, indignation and wrath, Tribulation and anguish, on every soul of man that does evil, of the Jew first, and also of the Gentile; But glory, honor, and peace, to every man that works good, to the Jew first, and also to the Gentile: For there is no respect of persons with God.” (Romans 2: 1-11)

Each of us is accountable. Each of us should be held accountable for our actions and deeds. Many suffer when turn our heads to the standards and allow injustice to take place. Many suffer when they put too much trust in a human being.

When all else fails, God yet remains and therefore, ‘IN GOD WE TRUST’.

PATERNAL CASTRATION

Fatherhood is and should be a rank of social status in both the home and the community. There is authority in being a FATHER. On the other hand, being a Daddy, is a privilege. Daddy is the one that takes you fun places and makes things entertaining for you life and development.


Our society has promoted the role of being a daddy to the extent that it has all but alleviated the honor of being a FATHER. There is no wonder that people lack one of the most essential characteristic traits that comes from the impact that a real father has on the lives of those around him. We see it every day in the sense of entitlement that everyone feels to do as they please without regard for how it affects others. We see it in the decline of moral and social standards. It can be described with one simple word, but I think Aretha Franklin sang it best when she belted out, ‘R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me’. What does it mean to us today?

One of the first places that a developing individual learns this concept of respect is from the Father. For he is the one who sets the boundaries of what will and will not be acceptable behavior for everyone in his presence and under his authority. His rank commands that what he says is to be give the utmost attention.

All of this ‘you are fine, just the way you are’, would not have been acceptable a generation ago. So what has changed? Fathers have been socially, morally and legally castrated. It seems to be ok with everyone, since it has not become official with physical castration. But when you take away the utmost identity of a person and their right to walk in their God given identity, you set things out of order. And this state of being out of order is affecting every aspect of our society. We must welcome all real fathers to take their rightful place in the home and in the community. We must encourage those who are slacking in their role as father to understand that they are needed by us all.

Although I am a female, I feel that I have some justified ability to speak on this matter because I am unmistakably a Daddy’s Girl. Anyone who knows me personally can testify to this fact. Also anyone who knows me can tell you that my father lives with authority in his home, in his church and in his community….so much so that there are now those who affectionately call him ‘Papa’. But when I was a little girl, people called him, ‘Mr. Williams’ and those adults who knew him well referred to him as ‘Big George’. And one thing that everyone knew is that you were not going to mistreat his daughter. This was not a topic of discussion. It was so.

Beyond his role as a father to me, he was also not going to let injustice happen to any other child in my neighborhood. His primary focus was his own child, but it reached further to be about the community at large. It was about what was morally correct.

This role of fatherhood didn’t develop in isolation, for my father, it came from his father, his grandfather and a host of men in his community that all understood that they were setting a standard for how the environment would govern itself with some standards of moral sensibility. It was the intention to not let another male give manhood a bad name.

That being said, I can not really find the words to express my frustration at the media fiasco that has come of the father who went onto the school bus to address the children that were mistreating his daughter. I cant condone his language or his verbiage, but I do commend him walking in the role of a father. It is completely within his right to speak to the child who is mistreating his child, and it is completely within him right to speak to the parents of the child or children who are mistreating his child.

More than his use of foul language, I am offended that he is being treated as if he has committed some criminal act for addressing the situation. Now if he had physically handled the child then I might make a different judgment on the matter, but his verbal response to the situation was to shift the boundaries of what was appropriate in the treatment of his daughter on the bus. Basic human rights.

There are those who say that this should have been handled by the authority of the school or by the guidance counselor. SINCE WHEN, SHOULD THE SCHOOL HAVE MORE SAY OR AUTHORITY IN THE PROTECTION OF A CHILD THAN THE BIOLOGICAL FATHER OF THE CHILD?

Statistically there is more justification for the entire community being involved in the raising of a child versus the standards falling on the governmental agencies. Less people went to jail when the extension cord, the belt, the switch and such were not illegal as a form of discipline. I don’t condone abuse, but there is a distinct difference in discipline and abuse. Every time your feelings get hurt you have not been abused.

Now intrusive government has made parents scared to discipline their children. People are walking around scared to make their children behave because some outsider my think it inappropriate. So now we all have to live with the little banshees conducting themselves with no respect for others or themselves.

And this situation on this school bus needed to be addressed by adults. This father is a grown man, so he shouldn’t have to function like a child and go tell someone to make them stop. A Father is not supposed to handle situations like a child would handle the situation by telling an adult. If the situation has escalated to the point of needing further intervention, then it would have been correct to involve the school authorities.

Where I come from we had a kind of fear that caused us to respect adults and conduct ourselves as best we could in the presence of an adult. So it really didn’t matter whose parents they were, we respected them because they were parents. It was that simple. And yes some of those parents didn’t always speak to us with kind and flowery word, but we knew better than to be disrespectful in their presence. We had social boundaries. It made us better people because we grew up with a sense of being in the world that produced a level of character in us that was and is unmistakable.

Now that I think about it, we were just as respectful of the administrators at our school as we were the parents in the neighborhood. And to say that our guidance counselor didn’t play, she was all about making sure we had the best opportunity to learn and think about our future. As teenagers we dreaded having to discuss our misconduct with her just as much as anything else. When we saw her coming down the hall, there was no question that we all became academic soldiers serious about staying focused for the next class. As a matter of fact, most of our teachers and administrators were serious about our academic progress and passed on that love of learning to us.

This is the other reason that this news story of the child on the school bus disheartens me because I want to hear about how the administrators care about the emotional and physical well being of the students on the school bus. The girl in this news story is struggling with all that she had to deal with and I am not seeing anything being addressed but that the father stood up to the children who where bullying the child… so much so that now the father is going to be called a bully. WHAT?

Let me go back to the town where I was raised, and point out all of the adults that were not going to tolerate children conducting themselves any kind of way, whether on the school bus, or anywhere else for that matter. If I went back to the 70’s and 80’s and just think about how we felt when a parent had to look out the door to see what we were doing because we got too loud, or to see who was playing in their yard, then I would have a Christmas list worth of bullies.
In a lot of ways, we knew the boundaries of us as children and the reality that we were not equals to adults. We understood that parents were to be respected. As children, we fought and disagreed with each other, and learned conflict resolution first hand, but the parents set the boundaries to make sure that things didn’t go too far.

If I had to list all of the adults that set us in line and threatened to do us harm if we didn’t conduct ourselves better, then over half of my neighborhood would have been in big trouble with the law because they enforced the social standards that helped us grow up in safety to become decent respectful adults.

Let us stop the media version of castration being done to a father who simple wanted to protect his daughter from emotional and physical harm. And I say, let this father be a father.

Let all fathers, who sincerely want to walk in the God given authority of being a protector and provider for their family and community, stand unashamed as they prepare the next generation to be good and moral citizens.