URIAH

In the story of David and Bathsheba, we have a very interesting person who seems to get the short end of the situation.  But I often wonder if this is the only way to look at this portion of text.  I say that because Uriah the Hittite represents one of my greatest fears.

Before I explain my views on this portion of text, let me give just a bit of background information about myself. My father had 5 brothers. I lived in the house with my dad and my oldest male cousin who was 12 years older than myself. So you can say almost all of my childhood was one of feeling very protected, affirmed, and loved.  I was my dad's only child so I was destined to be treated a certain way, better known as spoiled. With this many men in my childhood I was destined to not only get most anything that I wanted, because if one uncle said no, another uncle would either say yes, or find some way to compensate by offering something else that I might want. For example, if one uncle would not give me ice cream from the gas station up the street, all I had to do was to come back and make an announcement that I didnt get any ice cream.  This would be followed by the men having conversation about why I was denied ice cream or what ever it was that I wanted.  And not much time would pass before another uncle would invite me to go for a ride with him, only to end up at Kay's Ice Cream shop which had a whole bunch of flavors on display for me to choose from.  This understanding of how men treat those they care for and love has framed my understanding of relationships in general.  It has also set the bar for how I measure the behavior of men as an adult.

Growing up in a small town, during a time when people actually sat around and communicated with each other gave me a lot of insight from the perspectives of my aunts while they were stringing and breaking green beans or something.  And many times, I got to hear the conversations (while I was supposed to be playing in the yard and not listening) of my dad and his brothers talking about community issues, political events, but also to hear a lot of conversation about women and relationships. By the time I got to be a teenager, my dad started to really talk to me about relationships directly. And those conversations helped me to understand how and why he treated some of the women that he dated differently from others.


Now back to Uriah, in 2 Samuel 11, we are told the events that lead to his death in the hottest battle. But before he died, he was given a chance to go home to his wife. Now upon reading the story, this was not as any favor to Uriah, but it was truly a set up to cover up what was going on with David and Bathsheba.  So this is where I am going to talk briefly about Bathsheba's perspective, and how it reflects one of my greatest fears.

We really dont know anything about  Bathsheba and Uriah's relationship. We have no idea what Bathsheba shared with King David about her relationship or home situation. We are not given any insight into the pillow talk that Bathsheba had with Uriah or with King David. So what we have to go on are just the facts that are presented in the text.   I have heard it preached from a lot of different angles, and most of the time those angles portray  Bathsheba as having negative behavior and motives, which I am not completely  sure are presented in the wording or the tone of the text. But I am not going to debate that at this time.  I want to really get to a woman's perspective of  Uriah's decision not to go home to his wife.

Human behavior is very telling. Regardless of what a person says, their behavior tells the much larger portion of the truth. This frame of logic is how we are going to view Uriah's decision to sleep outside and not go home to his wife.  I am going to simply say that he didnt want her, he didnt want to go home to her.  He was a soldier who knew that he could die in battle any day, and he is given a chance to go home for a few nights to his wife and he would rather not, and says that it is his loyalty to the other soldiers who are not able to have this same opportunity to visit home.

A man in love, doesnt usually, really doesnt operate like that because love makes a man want to take every opportunity to spend time with the woman that  he loves, even if it means returning to battle and his death the next day.....  That is even more justification for him to take the opportunity to spend the night with the woman he loves. A man in love is caring and attentive, and willing to do his best to make sure the woman that he loves is happy.  It was not as if  Uriah was sneaking away to visit home, but he told to go home.  Now we dont know if he suspected something, or even if he had heard gossip, because that is not given to us in the text, all we have is the excuse that he uses to not go into his home to his wife.

So can you imagine what that must have felt like for Bathsheba? Her husband is in town, but is sleeping outside with servants and refusing to come home to her.  This is rejection, neglect, and disregard. Those are the things that a woman will get from a man who does not love her.  So imagine Bathsheba being married to a man who has so little affinity or interest in being a husband to her.  You might ask, so does this validate the theories that she was intentionally trying to be seen bathing?  I dont know. But what we do see is a married man who declares more loyalty to the army and to the king, than to his wife, or even a desire for her.

To be in a relationship marriage with someone who does not love you and who does not want you is a miserable way to live out your days. Having to pretend to family and friends that everything is ok when there is no real love or passion is hurtful and draining.  God's plan for marriage is for it to be the most loving and nourishing experience that affirms both the man and woman, in such a way that their bond is both spiritually and naturally strong.  So when we see Bathsheba move on with her life after Uriah's death, I cant help but to think that she must have mourned his death, but that she must have also been relieved to not have to any longer pretend that she was loved and cared for my a man who really didnt want to come home to her.  With Uriah out of the way, Bathsheba was free to be loved and cherished.

Distortion

Sin causes distortion, both in perspective and logic. This has been the case since the very beginning. From the 'you shall not surely die' to the present, the ways of distortion are the same, but the manifestations are every morphing.

In the Garden of Eden, when Adam and Eve did not drop dead at that exact moment, it began the distortion of timing and urgency. If one of them or both of them had died at that moment, it would have been the most clear message to them to obey, but it would have also been the end of their history. This is why these events were followed with some specific details as to what would happen for them in the rest of their lives as part of the consequences of their disobedience. But even those consequences did not change the outcome that was spoken to them, they would die.... not suddenly at that moment, but slowly aging and deteriorating. 

There has always been and will always be a price to be paid for sin. The pride of life makes each of us think that time is on our side, that we have plenty of time to worry later about living according to God's principles. But this distorted view also means that if we are not willing to live according to the plan of God for our lives, we forfeit the over arching truth of God's plan for our lives. Not just in the context of life or death, but everything in life before one dies. This can mean years and decades of living beneath what was God's plan to bless your life. The distortion of sin is to believe that you can get for yourself better than what God wants to give you. 

This makes some feel like the gamble is worth the risk to get what you can now and worry about the rest later.  In this way, sin has accomplished its purpose to distract and distort not only our perception of God, but of self.  Sin causes one to justify living in disregard to God's Biblical Principles. The distortion is manifested in the lack of urgency to do what it right, to work and strive toward doing what it right. Righteousness at its core is built around an internal desire to be as close to right as one possibly can in word and deed and intentions of heart.  The state of the heart is reflected in one's actions.

Therefore, the distortion of sin is actually a distortion of the state of one's own heart. To see one's ways without wanting to weigh it against God's truth is the internal struggle to justify what is in one's own heart.  The only way that the distortion can be removed so that one can truly see the truth of one's own heart is through God via the Holy Spirit to remove the distortion and giving the individual the opportunity to truly see one's self through the truth of God. What we see when we see our self through the truth of God can be hard to face, but necessary. We have to ask God to show us the ourselves as God sees us.   What will we really see when we become courageous enough to see what God sees? 

We all try to convince ourselves that our actions are justified and that our behavior is not that bad. But what is God really seeing?  What is really in our heart?  It takes the truth being clearly shown to the individual before the individual will realize there is a need for change toward doing what it right according to Biblical Principles. This is why the act of surrender is so important in the context of salvation. The ability to surrender to God and accept that Jesus Christ died for your sins, can have the most liberating effect.

Humbling is the reality that there are some things that one can not do for self. To realize that you can not change the condition of your own soul is humbling. It not only frees one from the bondage related to sinful habits and lifestyle choices, but it also frees one to be completely honest with God about areas of one's life that need to change for the better.  It is in this, that the heaviness of one's heart is no long a weight to carry, but is left at the foot of the Cross.

Surrendering to God means letting go of the facade that everything is alright and the spiritual heaviness of all of the distortion caused by sin. To need God, to seek after God means that you don't have to live outwardly appearing to be OK, but internally knowing you are a mess.  God is the mender of broken hearts.